cruel (but funny) ways to dump someone

ok..as the title suggests im lookin for all ur wierd wacky and downright horrid stories on the cruelties you have used to dump someone that...looking back...strikes you as highly amusing.

ok so i have a twin sister... and once wen i wanted to dump a guy who wouldnt be dumped i pretended he had slept with my twin(who was really me)and made a big song and dance about it lol. his face.....
ahhh memories.

i may be the only one to see this as a little..wrong

well.... if they deserve it! it's all worth it!! lmao! anyway... i'm a cool person, until they pi** me off-especially if the person is having an afair--then, there goes pay back...

but here are some amusing ways:

1.) Accuse them of being a player or bouncer--someone who has tons of gfs/bfs. Tell them you found out from one of their friends--don't say who, just make them wonder... and maybe they will admit they like more than one girl/guy! lol..
2.) Go on a date with the person you're going out with, and start crying, and say, "I heard you were cheating on me. I can no longer go out with you anymore"... say this, and see his/her reaction.
3.) Tell them your video games, job or blah blah is more important than them...then see their reaction!
4.) Have one of their siblings tell them--you're going out with someone else... Their sibling can pay them back and scare the he** out of him/her... haha... I had my boy friend's sister do this to him--when true, and it hurt him badly--and he believed it, cuz she went back and told him I was now seeing another boy infront of her... boy, he got so upset... now, we are back together now--since, well, I found out my new ex-boy friend I had was a player. I just broke up with him and started going out with someone else...but, now we are back together and it's great...

ne way.. if you want anymore idea, feel free to contact me through private message or w/e... feel free to! I will help ya come up with some ways...until then...

take care!

Michelle

am sorry.. but i never loved you.. Spam is my first love.. always have always will.. lol..

okay i never did this...

"Sorry, I cant go out with you because after having sex with you i have discovered that i am gay..."

oh and im not gay...

Write "Sorry, this isn't working." on a sticky note and stick it to their locker/front door where everyone can see it.

XD

ahh the marvels of email....

give them a note from the doctor saying that your relationship must cease at once because the mere sight of your face makes you violently sick.
haha

I had my friend send him flowers from a secret admire and cards in his locker. Then I she sent one with a guy's name on it that said 'Thanks for the lay'. Haha, he was he read it out loud when I was standing right there. Haha, I knew about it but he didnt know that so he kept sending me flowers and stuff trying to apologize hehe.

i dont think that's a way to dump someone tho... unless you accuse him of being secretly gay and dump him...hmmmm.... the mind boggles...hehe.

I dunno if you've heard of them but there are these pre-recorded celeb messages yu can get saying you're dumped i wud love 2 send someone that!!

love
XxFeEBeDeExX

lol i think the best way is to dump all his stuff outside in bin bags and change the locks... when he comes home pretend you never met him before in your life!!

tell them your getting a sex change and you want to be with someone who has also had a sex change.

tell them sorry but your engaged via arranged marriage an lol the twin one was mean! as was txt *laughs evilly*

oh yer i told an ex that going out wid him turned me gay. best part shortly afta i did turn gay!
poor guy still thinks its his fault muhahahaha

You are one sadistic lady haha

oh i like it lmfao

lol thank you

*takes a bow*

thru a valentines day card. or theu a ITS A BOY! card

lol think u mean violent hun

these are cruel. Personally if i wanted to sump someone then i would just explain to them why and i wouldnt be cruel at all.
But me and my b/f are going strong and have been for 2 years so no need to dump him

on radio1
there wast a girl that had gone phyco oafter being dumped and had gotten on to all this online things like email and told every1 that he was dead lol
ok i got one ........... what to do to people after they dumped you
mexx

My first 'boyfriend' had a hard time reading. One day he pointed to a book I had just finished reading and said some thing like, "I've read that, it's a good book." I was thinking like 'whew! Note optoin is back up!' I had been avoiding him sense like the first week we started going out, so I was able to give a note to my brother to give to him.... The dude was my brothers friend first (my brother has some cute friends okay!) and they had some how became enemys so I was also un-confortable with that. The note said some thing like 'we don't see each other enough' .... And I was avoiding him, connectoin?
It's not quite as funny as could be if I told you the scare I got when my fake 'cusent' told me he was their cusent. Then my brother told me he was adopted, then he told me he wasn't.... Confusing?

I haven't done this, but pass a note in a class that your boyfriend is also in. Make sure the teachure is the type that reads them out loud. Write 'your name is going to brake up with his name at (enter some time that day here)' Then smile at him and say "See ya then!"

lol and Alex Marlatt if u think thats cruel remind me 2 tell you the rest sometime!;)

lol
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Trashed is dumped
And so are you
haha
"you're too good for me...*point to some hot guy* but he's not" haha

ok once wen someone dumped me i went to his house before i gave the key back and sewed shrimps into the hems of his curtains and grass seeds on his carpet....so small that he never did see em til the grass started to grow hehehe.... i then handed the key back to him when i saw him next. his house stank for ages cos he couldnt figure out what was wrong!! haha... gotta love those stories in mags...they give u some gr8 ideas!!

lol i like tht one!

I once caught my ex cheating on me. He had some close left at my house. I calmy went to his place and got all my close and my house key.

The next day I took his underwear left at my place and washed them then dryed them. After the laudry detail I smeared poinson ivy all inside the underwear (front and back).

I took them back to his house and placed them in his dresser drawer. Imagine his surprise when he broke out with poison ivy in the most sensitive areas...

--Sher

awww we dont have poison ivy in ireland darnit!!!

LOL Mandie

hehe *takes mental note*

Come on people...Has ~no one~ faked their own death yet?!?
*VioletRaven*

I knew a girl once who always dumped a guy by calling him up and singing

"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Trash is dumped, And so are you."

Not that great but it's different.