Help Me!

I feel like my whole life is crashing down around me. I was molested at least 5 times and almost raped, my dad has deserted me, my best friend tried killing herself a few weeks back, and because of it my mom won't even let me talk with her. Over half of my family thinks i am a liar because i told about the molestations, AND I DON'T KNOW WTF TO DO BECAUSE MY HEAD IS GOING AROUND IN A HUNDRED DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS!!!I WANT TO DIE!! WHY AM I STILL HERE!! I FEEL LIKE MY WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN A TEST OF MY EMOTIONAL STRENGHT!!!
I just need someone to talk to...

you can always talk to me... i dont know how much help id be but i'd love to try and help

Thanx I appriciate it. I'm feeling really stressed at the moment.

Im sorry.. I feel stressed alot also.. and sometimes just to talk to someone to get someone else to understand it helps.. do you have msn? or do you just wanna talk on the thread?

I dunno. I don't have any instant messengers. I just feel like forces beyond my control are driving me down a road I can't turn back.

Yeah i know exactly how you feel.. im sorry

I just think that some of this bullsh*t is my fault... If I would have never gotten in my uncle's car I never would have been molested. If I would have told my dad "I love you" more often he probably wouldn't have left. The list goes on and on...

No None of that is YOUR fault. For your dad its HIS fault he is missing out on who you are today HE made the choice not YOU... And for your uncle.. You should be able to trust your uncle for pity sake you shouldnt have to worry about getting in his car.. if your own family isnt safe to ride with then who is.. none of that is your fault it truely isnt

I just feel like it is. I can't sleep at night because I have nightmares about these things. I have even started cutting. Sometimes I just want to die...

I think every so often every one feels like they want to die... but just stay strong and hold on.. Ive never understood the whole cutting thing.. ive had problems where all i could do was cry and stuff but i never wanted to hurt myself i guess cuz i was already in enough pain why cause more? Just pain and suicide solve NOTHING.. and arent the answer

I don't think anyone would care if I died. At least not in my family.... Half of them hate me for what I've done to my uncle and brother-in-law. I still have to go to court and face them. I'm so scared.

What you've done to your uncle and brother - in - law how bout what they've done to you thats ridiculous.. im sorry that just ticks me off .. like its your fault.. Im so sorry... what about your mom.. i bet she'd care..

Yeah my mom cares. All my Imediate family believes me, but not most of my aunts and uncles and most of my cousins. They all think I'm lying.

Gurl im proud of you because you haven't killed yourself! And you are a strong person as far as i can tell because you haven't fallen after all that has happened to you! And when ever you need someone to talk to im alway's here to listen! Im sorry for what happend to you but just pray to God and know that he is always there for you when you think everything is falling apart he's just waiting for you to ask him to help you! Well I hope i can help you more! But so far this is what I have to say! well you can e-mail me at: desaristar@aol.com
^_^

damn lolipop, datz some deep s### i wouldnt know wat to do if all dat had happened to me man i feel real bad for you but im really glad ur choosing to try to get help b-4 doing something stupid. i know u dont know me and all but you can talk to me if you want. i couldnt imagine all your going through but i could try to understand! really_special_yuri@yahoo.com

Thanx everyone. I feel like i actually have friends now...