I hate lying

I have been struggling with anorexia/bulimia for about a year now, and though people knew about it before, they all think Ive stopped all eating-disordered behavior. But I really haven't. If anything I've gotten worse and ive just gotten better at lying about it. I don't appear to have an eating disorder becaus eI'm not really skinny or nething but I Still have one and its tearing me apart. I am back with my ex, and today he read some of my poems about anorexia that i wrote awhile ago and asked me if I still did that stuff. I said no, but i hate lying to him. I don't know if i should tell him about my problem or not. I dont want him to leave me again because that would break my heart and make things worse for me. No one knows my disorder is still a part of me. what do i do???

The truth hurts but its better to be told before its too late.
You can't keep it a secret forever, especially lying to your loved ones.
How can someone so young hate herself enough to do something like that?
Before you love and protect others you must love and protect yourself.
Tell the truth.
If it is a disorder you need help, or you can suffer the pain of guilt and the pain of your eating disorder for a long time, and believe me living with guilt sucks.

Keeping a secret from someone is just as bad as lying. Especially if that secret is something that can change the relationship. If you don't tell him, and he finds out, he will be more hurt. The truth may hurt, but lies will do more damage.

As for your eatting disorder, the world is full of delicious foods. Have a blast. But if you think society will shun you because you're 'fat', maybe you should look around. The world is full of people of all shapes and sizes. Be who you are, not someone you aren't, because the people who make it, are the ones who are themselves. Be who you want to be.

you need to tell your boyfriend and your family, they can get you the proper help you need, if he loves you then he will be willing to help you and stick by you. you really need to eat because you are really harming yourself. you realise that you have a problem and that is the first step to getting well, and that really takes a lot of courage *hugs* hope you get better soon.

If you want the secret to get out tell one person. Even your boyfriend I told mine (my ex) on the computer one night. BTW he wasn't a computer boyfriend either. We just talked on here after school. And I didn't know his mom read his convos and neither did he but so now his mom knows. But she promised me she wouldn't tell anyone. He knows when I get realyl depressed or sad I cut and well his mom knows that too know. So when we got in our fight I just lied and said I lied about everything because he threatened to turn me in. DO YOU WANT THAT!?!?!?!?!?!?! No! Which will create more lies and soon you'll feel horable for lying your way out of it. I know I do. But I can't go back to the way I was. counseling, haveing everyone whatch me, people worry. Now everyone thinks I am fine. I am strugling with cutting and anorexia(sp?) If you want help tell. The only reason I told my boyfriend is because he threatened to never talk to me again. And I loved him alot. I still do, He just doesn't know that. But now he just lies for me in class when I don't eat if we have pizza or w/e he is like she doesn't like to eat in front of ppl. and I just get a funny like like ummm ok that's weird. But I ain't skinny either but I don't eat. Total calories in a day is 300 at the most. My friends say I don't eat. But never suspect. Well this is really long I'll quit but if you want someone to talk to email me rachelmchenry2010@hotmail.com or add me on MSN

or Yahoo:rachelmchenry2004

or AIM: rachxx10

or myspace lol www.myspace.com/emochicka allright I am done now lol sorry for taking up your time.

♥ rach