I have a BIG problem

It seems every time i have a boyfriend, my \"best friend\" finds a way to mess it up. i have been holding of telling her about my boyfriend until today. when i told her today she was acting cool about it, and she go this number from my cell phone witout telling me...then during my fourth period she texts me and says \"i dont like ur boyfriend cuz he wont txt back\"...previously she gets my boyfriends numbers and finds out stuff to have gainst them and then i guess u could say she brainwashes me to hate them. i had a great boyfriend about a year ago and she told me to break up with him and made up stuff to make us break up...i dont know what to do about her cuz i still want to have her as a friend but i just cant seem to tellher about my boyfriends...i dont know if it\'s jealousy or if she\'s just being mean..help plz

umm... gee that IS a tough problem... I think it is jealousy. If this friend is doing stuff to you like brainwashing you, then she isnt a good friend. and the word brainwashing gives me a bad feeling. you shouldnt have to deal with somebody who is telling you things about another person you care about. either she is jealous of you and your relationships, or she is jealous that you keep getting boyfriends and she may feel that you dont have enough time for her. i would suggest asking her about it. walk up to her and say, " Hey, (friends name), why dont you like (boyfriends name)? Is it something he did to you? or is he taking me away too much of the time? because i am really confused about this."
If this doesnt work then she is not worth it as a friend.

-Allanah Rayne (If you need to talk PM me... I'm almost ALWAYS available!)

It sounds to me that it is diffinitly jeolousy! She is probably jeolous because you can get relationships. Some people can get many boyfriends, but little relationships. And it probably bothers her that you can and she can't. Or she may be scared she will lose you to him. You have to diffinitly talk to her. It would be hard, but you really have to. You can not continue this way, and you can't not tell her. I am sorry, but it seems you're going to have to talk to her to make a change. Good Luck.

I think she's beeing both - mean and jealous.

The situation is absurd. Shes just messing up youre life, because she probably feels left out or something, without you actually leaving her out..

I think you should talk to her. Say how you feel, and ask the questions you want to ask. Even though she might run out of the room, saying she'll never talk to you again, or start crying, remember you deserve an answer.

If she leaves you, she'll probably come back, begging you to forgive her. And you just tell her to never do it again.

If you need anyone to talk to, just send me an e-mail... You find it at my profile.

I used to think it was jealousy too...but i thought how could my best friend be jealous? i called my boyfriend and i told him tht i dont want them talking unless i am there becuz i know the way she is...he said he'd stay away from her becuz he doesnt want our relationship to be messed up by something worthless. today we both didn't talk, and it got me annoyed cuz she expects me to beg for her to talk to me after SHE did something wrong...i know i will have to tak to her sooner or later it just bugs me how she has to do this to me all the time...besides she has always had a busy schedule and never time for me so i don't see how my boyfriend could "take time away from us"...she hasn't even been there for me lately, there are days where she won't even talk to me...if anyone has been there for me it is my boyfriend and i'm not gonna let him go becuz of her!

GOOD FOR YOU!!! :D

i think you should tell her how you feel and if she's really your friend she'll stop...just tell her it hurts you feelings and your tired of it!!! i hope everything works out!!

XoXoXo
JESSiE

I've definately run into people like this... It's jealousy in its ugliest. She seems to be the insecure type that needs to find control in other people's lives because she has little or none of her own. She desires what you have, and thinks she can't have the same... So she pulls out what stops she can to make sure you stay on the same level. They say misery loves company... I say you cut this thorny weed from your garden. She's a cancer to you that'll only fester and make life a living Hell for you.

^^I LOVE UR ANSWER....i've been ignoring her lately because it does seem like she is making my life a living hell...her ex-boyfriend also thinks she is doing the same. Her ex is like my big brother and when she broke up with him she said it was the best thing for them but now she makes a living hell out of his new girlfriend. It just seems to me that she can't see any of her friends happy....EVER! Even when she is happy, there can not be anyone else that is happy. I've warned my boyfriend and told him not to pay attention to her and he says he won't...which is good!! Now only if she could just stop doing that, I mean she's a very cool girl but she brings too much drama! THANK U ALL FOR THE HELP!! I've really been finding great answers wit ya'll more than I would with people I normally meet!! I LOVE POET FRIENDS!

Thank you. I'm glad I could be of help to you. The more I read this situation though, the question keeps ringing: "Is she really happy?" She may look happy, but it could just be a fascade to keep people from seeing how she really feels. Her behavior isn't justified by that by any means and I think she needs counseling. I think the best thing you can do is to do what you're doing - ignore her negative behavior. But also, do try to talk to her and see what may be bothering her.

Okay everyone I've officially had enough of her crap...forgive my language if it's bad....I called my boyfriend this morning to say 'Good morning' and he told me that some girl called him last nite saying she was Erica and that she was telling him stuff to try to break us up. I didn't get the whole conversation because he was at work so he couldn't talk for long. But this is what she did with my ex-boyfriend. She calls and is tempting them to break up with me and she'll flirt with them and it was her who called. So ^^ can you tell me how this is looking after me when I'm freaking hurt that my so-called best friend is hurting the hell out of me? I'm done with her, I'll talk to her maybe hi or bye but there is no way I can trust her anymore....if anybody has any answers plz help me!!

If she doesn't have a boyfriend then she is jealous.

Well in this case, you drag her out back by her hair, throw her down and shoot her in the head like a rabid dog.

Just kidding. Please don't take that into any conscideration, because I'd rather not see that on tonight's evening news... I might feel just a little bad...

But what you need to do is not pay her any attention, and seek the assistance of a school counselor, your parents.. anybody in a position of authority. Talk to them and see if they can help you handle it. What she is doing is wrong, and borderline harassment. She needs to understand that she can't go around doing this crap to people she calls her "friends".

Eclipse thanx for the help I am actually just about to go talk about this wit my older sister because I can't go trough it anymore. Best friends should never do this to each other its just damn right wrong....I hope no one has to go trough this because its horrible to have to be stabbed int he back by ur own so-called best friend

She is so totally JEALOUS

She is totally jealous, talk to her give her an ultimatum, tell her shes either friends with you, therefore she keeps her fat nose out of you and your boyfriends business, but reassure her you'll spend equal amounts of time with her and your boyfriend, incase she is feeling insecure. if she wont accept that tell her its over because life is too short to mess around with silly sad immature people because you'd rather be out having fun, than having to put up with the consequences of her pathetic and dire actions which have no relevance to her what so ever!

ignore her when it comes to ur bfs if uhave 2

dont b patient, bc friends tend to get jealous if u have a bf (i did over my best friend cuz she wouldnt spend time with me)

and thank ur bf for being the sweetest thing not to answer any rough texts!!

And thats what you call a friend?

Gees you have a lot to learn...shes a some of the time friend and you deserve better...personally I wouldnt call her a friend at all...thats not what friendship is about!

I, personally, would tell her EXACTLY, word-for-word (with a little editing, of course) what was on my mind and then if she doesn't back off I'd ditch her.

I don't know the WHOLE story, but it sounds like she's super-jealous and probably isn't really your friend.

Who knows, though. She might not even realize she's doing it. Most people with self-esteem issues don't realize they're doing things to bring other people down.

//Tragic\\

A 'best friend' even if she did feel a little jealous, would never try to make you miserable by splitting you and your bf up, she would be happy for you, however difficult it may be at times.. i don't think you can class this girl as you best friend.. infact i would go as far as to say she is not a friend at all.. my best friend has hated my last 2 partners, and had very good reason to, although she didnt like them, she always stood by my choice to be with them, never tried to split us up, always stuck by my side and is still there to pick the pieces up, knowing she was right all along.. and still never says "i told ya so" even though she could xx

jealous. yup. purely jealous. everyone else drained the hell out of my ideas, so that's all i've to say..

kk like i gots 2 bffs rit and they r boath way pretter than i ame and one gots a guy thats her x and she still reely likes him and they broke up cuz my other bff said that it was all a bet and so her and the guy (her x) hav been talkin rit and the guy goes over to my other friends house and she gets undressed infrount of him and they make out ya its bs and she knew that she stlll liked him gerrr.... ya and the same thing happened to me i liked this guy and she comes over when he comes over and they make out right infrount of me and it was the same chick so ya my friend as a hoe and i wannetd to tell u dis that way u think that u rnt the only one that has been in this problem sry if its confusing im a confusing person

^
/ bff means best friend i ant a how wit 2 bf hahaha kk then