*~*~* This ones for the self-harmer *~*~

A while a go i would never talk to about my self-harm. If something came on the tele i would just look away or if someone mentioned it i would just change the subject.
After alot og change in my life, i found someone who cared enough to spend the time with me and talk to me aobut things. One of the things this person was interested in was my self-harm.
I had never spoke about it with anyone, but i did with this person and i told them all sorts of things. They just asked questions such as 'how it started' 'why you do it' and 'what effect does it have' plus many more.
After talking about it i felt better, i didnt feel better about doing it or feel as if it was a good thing. it was just nice to talk to someone about it when they aren't thinking your a completely maniac who is trying to kill themselves.
This person was perticualary great and made the whole thing quite light harted although we both knew it was serious. But this helped me to stop or at least cut down a huge amount.

Well what i'm trying to say is i thought i would make this post so people can freely talk about their self-harm maybe share some stories and maybe offer each other help.

what i won't appriciate is people coming in here talling us we are stupid and criticising what we do... because of everyone that has critcised us we have critcised ourselves the most.

We are ALL our own worst critic. Cutters alone do not suffer from that. We all do it to ourselves once in a while. And if you want advice and people are brutally honest about it...I don't see the problem. You want help. They're doing the best they can...

Cutting IS a terrible, selfish thing to do to yourself and everyone else around you. It breaks hearts when you don't see it. Someone will ALWAYS love you. At night, someone is always thinking about you. No one is ever completely alone. Ever think of that when you cut?

You don't just harm yourself when you cut, or burn, or w.e. it is you do. You hurt every single one of those undeserving friends of yours.

But I admit, it does take one heck of a character to make something as serious as suicide or self-harm, sound common. Truth is-its not normal. And it IS attention seeking, whether you see it right now or not.

I USED to cut.
And once I told my parents because I wanted it to end, they told me to just go kill myself if that was what I wanted.

And once they said that...

once I got even more negative attention...i realized I just wanted everything like that to end. I had to start helping myself before anyone could help me. I've had lots of friends try to commit suicide when their lives...there is nothing wrong with them at all.

Its life.

Its hormones.

Keep in mind that no one is perfect. We all have our demons and we all live life. It's never EASY for anyone!

i like the way you think, its very strong willed.

i never sadi is wasn't terrible and yea, i do think it is. i just wouldn't say it is selfish myself.

Maybe your right about there being someone that loves you, but sometimes you just dont like to admit it. well i don't like to, i like to be independant and not admit to having people there because i like to deal with things on my own. although not the best policy.

Thing is self-harm i much more common than it used to be but i would not advise someone to convert to that lifestyle. I wouldnt want to see someone go through something like that in their life.

I told my mother and she said she would get me
sectioned in a hospital and thought she would tell a bunch of people to.. which i should never forgive her for. but at the same time thank her for.

I never said life was only hard for some people. I know there are plenty of people out there with far worse lives than i have or you have or anyone has... But at the end of the day that's life and we all have different views as to what we think is hard or not

The more you allow yourself to see it as common, the more lenient you become and accepting of it. And that's wrong. It promotes it. But if you teach people that its NOT right, that it does nothing to help, then they'll see that too.

I'm still dealing with all of my suicidal actions from years ago. My mom has done NOTHING to help. She continuously tries to send me to an mental institution every time i get even remotely upset. She has no understanding of anyone but her own pain.

Life is hard no matter WHO you are. But if my mom was right about one thing it was that suicide is NEVER an option.

Don't even SEE it as an option and you'll stop thinking of it as one. You'll learn quickly that there is no way out. That you HAVE to fight and there is no other choice, no other way.

I am so grateful for my life even though I rarely show it. My best friend has cancer and I'm fearful that I may have it too. Its a terrifying thought, especially since I would do anything to avoid needles. I haven't told my family about the bruises that randomly keep appearing because this IS my life. My life and I'll live it like it was meant to be lived. I don't want to spend any amount of time in the hospital. I don't want scars for the IV's. I don't want to be poked with needles or anything.

Its a newfound respect for life. It is SO beautiful. Happiness may be rare to find, but when you have it...Idk. Its just great, isn't it? To be able to smile and forget about everything else? Moments like that are worth every ounce of pain in life.

Cutting does nothing to help and surely you see that too, right??

At times, I used to wish that no one loved me at all so it would be easier to disappear and no one would notice. It would be as if I never existed. But that's not the case. Every human on this earth leaves a mark on someone, means something to SOMEONE. And I've come to find that it is impossible to disappear without ONE person crying.

And you're luck if you never see someone going through this depression stage...it truly is excruciatingly difficult to convince yourself that you're respsonsible for someone's life when they're holding a gun and they tell you first about what they're going to do. Because suddenly, it's like you have to speak quickly to get through, but what in the WORLD could you ever say to someone who is disregarding your pain? What could you really say to someone to save their life?

It's definitely hard. Especially the guilt if something does happen.

But hey. You'll get through anything if you want to. And you know what? Look at it like this.

Every ounce of pain you fight through...every tragedy you have been through, every time something terrible went wrong-you're a stronger person because of it. You can honestly say, "I made it through this" and you can be assured that you're strong. Every pain is an obstacle you can get over. You become stronger and stronger each day. And with your knowledge of how you made it through, you could help someone else who is at a loss, or hopeless, and doesn't know how to make it through.

self-harm usually isnt for attention.

Check out the poem called ''Self harm is for attention?'' by master of shadow

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=573350

....if you're going to say that could you back it up with something?

It is for attention. It was for me too. When I wanted help, I would never come right out and admit it. I just made things worse until someone finally realized it, too.

It is for attention and I don't have to read some poem to change my mind. I know what I went through, and I know what my friends went through, and trust me. MOST OF THE TIME, it is for attention.

I have nothing against the way you think and what you say... you are obviously very certain of your thoughts.

I do have different views to you. Because i do not believe that everyone cuts for the attention.
It is easy to say 'oh yea they do it cuz they want people to give them attention' - but i personally think that to do something that drastic to get attention is very desperate and in some ways i feel sorry for that person.

I never did it for attention, and even though you say everyone does. That is strictly not true.

Ok i have just realised that you wrote MOST OF THE TIME in big capital letters... sorry i didnt mean to jus assume that.

in some things you say i do agree, yes i think cutting is not the way to solve anything. But it helped.
I wouldnt talk about things without noing about them first. Even though you say things in your life make you stronger which to some extent i believe but sometimes dont you ever think 'why me?' - really is there a need to go through things in life that are out of the ordinary and difficult...

Well i guess the answer is yes, pretty stupid question. I can here the classic 'you wouldn't be the person you are today if you didn't' phrase coming to mind...

Anyway add me on msn if you have it k3z_w0z_3r3@hotmail.co.uk
I would like to make friends thats if you want to

I also said IN MOST CASES, it is for attention.

Goodness, I've actually known people who have committed suicide, jumped off bridges, shot themselves, slit their wrists.

And I never knew for a SECOND that they weren't okay.

So I'm sorry for saying that. But in MY case, it was for attention. If you're on this site and saying "IM A CUTTER AND PROUD OF IT" then you're just after attention. Or if you're saying "IM A CUTTER AND I CANT STOP"....what's that going to do?

Poem-wise. I have poems about self-harm too, in that perspective. I USED to cut, remember? I agree, writing helped me get through a lot of it. In fact, I typically love that perspective of writing. It helps me get through things without actually hurting myself anymore. Probably hard to understand, but I have and sometimes I still do write like that.

Should I rephrase then? That not everyone wants attention, but there still are a vast majority of cutters who do this FOR that attention.

Just as I think I have offended you (for which I'm sorry)....

You have somewhat hurt me too.

"but what you dont see are the millions of people who, in real life, never speak a word about theirs."

Like I said. I DO see that. I've seen it in my life continuously. Perhaps I forgot to consider them in my wording, but I know from experience what its like to lose someone to suicide and never know it was coming.