Stupid Problems. Meh.

God, I don't like posting problems. I despise it actually, but I'm so fed up at the moment, I just want to vent or something.

Last summer, I'd had enough of the guy I was seeing. I finally wanted something serious, he didn't, I decided enough was enough, and I disconnected myself from the who guy/sex world for a while. I needed to do this, and it's helped me focus on other aspects of my life.

So skip forward to March this year. I'd had nothing to do with guys since August the previous year, but then I finally talk to someone I'd never really spoken to before. We became friends, we flirted, we got on absolutely fine. We kissed. Everything was fine - and it carried on fine - then he just went cold on me one day. He's too 'nice' to ignore me completely, but then we'll only talk if I make the effort. Otherwise, he won't even both saying hi. In fact, the best I usually get these days is a smile of acknowledgement - but he's done this before, and then gone back to normal with me a couple of weeks later.

Anyway, because I've disconnected myself from guys for such a long amount of time, this is the first crush I've had in a year. And now I'm spending all my damn time pining over this stupid guy, and I'm seriously angry at myself. He's younger than me, he has no aspirations in life and I'm gonna be honest, I'm much too intelligent for him. Oh yeah, and I find him boring (well come on, most of you would, if you can't get a stimulation conversation out of him - and drinking beer is his favourite hobby). I'm absolutely furious with myself for wasting time on this idiot, yet I can't stop thinking about him.

Well, I know it's mainly down to the fact that he is probably the most attractive single guy I know. Shallow, I know, but looks are important (I'm not going to argue the all reasons why). I don't know any other guys.

I am attractive. I won't pretend otherwise. And when I leave town, I do get chatted up, but I can't afford to keep catching the bus to different places - and besides, I'll feel stupid going to other towns in search of men.

God, I don't even know what I want you to say. Or why I'm telling you this. I like someone. He's interested, then not interested (and repeat another five times). I can go on being single forever, but I do get very lonely - I am human afterall. And I won't lie - I miss the physical side of things too.

GRRRR. Rant over for now I suppose. Someone say something nice to me! Please.