And you just want to know that someone cares

I feel strange sometimes... today I found myself trying to impress a boy. Why? What for? I knew that I sounded fake and attention-seeking, doing complicated stamps, talking in a foreign language with my sister, anything to be noticed... and I probably don't even like him. Really, don't even know him.

Have you ever done that?
I look around and I know that I am young, but at the same time I feel that even in a few years I could never be good enough to be loved by a boy...
Perhaps I underrate myself, but I feel useless sometimes. Wow, maybe this should go in the depressed section, but I'm not sad, not THAT much, anyway, just bittersweet and troubled in the heart.

//T.L.//

I know how you feel. Honestly, I won't even like a boy but when one comes around, especially if I know he's smart or something like that, then I'll try to impress him. And then I'll stop trying. But again, he'll still be on my mind and I won't want to make myself look like a fool around him. I feel it's because I've been rejected by guys in the past, like, no one's ever made a move/indicated that they liked me, and it's a part of me that wants that attention, even though I don't like they guy. It's wierd, and awkward, and I hate it, so I can't really offer any advice on that one. It's something I'm tryign to stop, however. I'm trying to get out of that frame of mind. I know what I've got to offer, and any guy that doesn't want to make a move for me doesn't deserve me. I know that may sound conceited lol, but it's not an excuse to act snobby around them. I know that someday someone IS going to make a move for me and that it's going to be worth it. You are worth being loved, we all are, but not many people realize it. Either that or, thye do realize it, but don't want to make a move because they feel that THEY don't deserve YOU, so most likely you're admired from afar. Just hang in there; the troubled heartedness will eventually go away as you be yourself, don't lower yourself just to impress someone.

^^ Thanks, Lovely Bones.. I've just been depressed lately. It seems that no one could love me, but maybe they (boys) also feel the same.
Of course, no one has tried to impress me :-) Why would they? My middle name is Loser.
But that's okay, because I guess that it would just be a distraction, but I still feel so angry with myself. Like I could lop my own head off.

//T.L.//

i've actually been thinking about showing off alot lately... and i think we all do it, or atleast most of us(people/teens) i myself notice if a chick in my english class is around, and a guy who also likes her, we always end up beating the shit out of each other within 10 seconds of knowing shes there, i fought a returning grad whose on the football, rather than just walking by because a girl that constiently flirts with me, and i with her, was walking by. this one girl from the u.k. only has a accent when she knows a certain guy is around. my buddie dan turns into the biggest prick when this one girl is with us, i've noticed some people saying stories like "remember when we drank all that beer at the docks and got chased by the cops..." just loud enough for that one girl to hear

i've seen lots of people do it... and the people who it's directed to rarely seem to notice, unless it's insanely obvious that ones showing off

" i've noticed some people saying stories like "remember when we drank all that beer at the docks and got chased by the cops..." just loud enough for that one girl to hear"

^ I HATE it when a guy thinks that stuff like that is cool or hott.. it's definately not. It actually makes me lose respect for them and I start to think that they're a loser...
..sorry for any possible harshness in that statement.. just telling the truth according to me =D

We all do it at least once if not more. Believe me, i've done it. I don't feel good about it, but sometimes are minds work that way. Sometimes we really want to impress someone because we want them to notice us. The best thing to do is be yourself. You should never try to be something you're not. The best people are those who accept you for who you are. If you needed to impress that guy just to get his attention, he's not worth it.

Well, thank you all a lot, guys.
It's so nice that people answer me here. I can't really even talk to my sister about it, because she would probably only laugh and tease me about it for a few days...come to think of it, I'd probably do the same.
I'm just glad that it's a normal stage, but I feel so foolish now, I'm sure that the boy will have noticed it and look at me strange. Then again, I should let it bother me... just try to move on. Hahah, he probably already his a girlfriend, or will have soon. I just have to accept that I am a lone wolf :)

//T.L.//

^^Thanks a lot, really, Amber. The problem is that we take a class together... so I see him every Friday. It's not even that much of a crush, really...just a really stupid act-now-think-later sort of show-off I wanted to do... I suppose if I act natural he'll just brush it off. :-S I hope so at least, it would be embarassing to get weird looks from him every once in a while.
Okay, I think I'm over it, but I'll keep you posted.

//T.L.//

i've tried impressing a lot....just to find myself questioning why...just as you have. it's fun in a way... to take a risk, see if you get noticed, see how they react...but at the same time it can be depressing...when they dont look, or react. i understand exactly how you feel. things will turn around. there's someone out there for everyone. you'll find your boy. you have so much life ahead of you. dont worry. i promise. sometimes all you need is a hug so..... *HUG* hehe. take care sweetie. i hope you're doing ok.

It's weird, I just found out a little more about this boy, like I looked on his fotolog... and his cousin also said that he had missed the martial arts more than anything because of simple laziness. It's nice, that I no longer have the need to impress him :)

//T.L.//

It sounds like you dont have enough self confidence.
Boys notice you when your being real, and when your not afraid to be who you really are.
Dont be ashamed of who you are, love who you are and be confident in who you are.
You have to love yourself before anybody else can love you.