Make Me Cry

******AMAZING! WINNERS LISTED BELOW!!!******

So, this is my second contest. The first was pretty fun, but only two came back for prizes. =S
Anyways..

Make me cry. I do not care what the poem is about, make me cry. I am pretty heartless (( =D )), so it will be hard. Write about something that means the most to you... That happened in your life. If you know about it, the more feeling you can put into it. Make sense? GOOD LUCK!

Rules:
-NO friendship poems. God, PLEASE spare me.
- Love poems are EXTREMELY hard to write. Espically to make one cry. But you can try.
-If you win, YOU MUST LEAVE TITLES. I will not search.
-New OR old. =]
-No cussing... It is just immature in a poem. Only a little if you HAVE to.
- I believe that is it..
- HAVE FUN!

xDarkSuicidex

Prizes:
1st: 8 comments/votes, 3 critized poems.
2nd: 4 comments/votes, 2 critized poems.
3rd: 2 comments/votes, 1 critized poem.

---This is going fast. Ends after 15-20 poems!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------
The List:

1. ConCealedInAddiction {Done}
2. youre acting like a d-m- saint {Done}
3. Broken Fallen Angel {Reserved}
4. Jess~ Squiggle Master~ {Done}
5. ~*Who Cares?*~ {Done}
6. Adam {Done}
7. Aken Sol {Done}
8. FliritingWithDeath {Reserved?}
9. Oscar {Done}
10. Bryan {Done}
11. Ciao {Done}
12. )|x.Ba.ilz &// *F[r[iends* Ok {Done}
13. Tine.x.Beautiful.Lie..>Worth {Done}
14. *ςανίη mэ*-xxixlovexyouxx{Done}
15. ~~Lindsay Woods~~{Done}
16. blissful-bearje{Reserved}
17. ChanceM {Done}
18. Noni Wang (Thank you for entering!!!) {Reserved}
19. Donna {Done}
20. Marsha {Done}
21. Beloved {Done}
NOW THE RESERVES!!!

leave a spot pls!

so does it hav to b new..or old..and leave me a spot!!

ConcealedAddiction--
This is just fine. New or old, does not matter. But try to make me cry. Remember, I am heartless.

xDarkSuicidex

...i suck at making people cry. i am heartless and hence cant make a poem with a lotta emotion lol

You Need to Eat

Baggy, blood-shot eyes,
Stains from tears cried.
Sore throat, messed up mouth,
But let's take our gaze south.

Skinny tummy, nothing there,
People always point and stare.
"You need to eat," they say,
Food goes in, but doesn't stay.

Goes out with friends, eats a lot,
Comes home, loses all she's got.
Looking in the mirror, put to shame,
"I'm so fat!" is said, screaming in vain.

Counselors try and help, no avail,
Barred in her prison with no bail.
"You need to eat!" is all that's heard,
Now can't stop the mutiny that's occurred.

Only 98 pounds, but still trying to lose,
Giving in to drugs and booze.
She slits her wrists and writes a note,
Dies right there next to her final quote:

"Here I am, no longer for you to see,
'You need to eat' 4 words that describe me.
I'm sick of you all, caring too much,
Now you'll never again feel my soft touch"

Passionate Kiss

She glistens under the lamp's light
in a parking lot paved gray.
As the crushed Autumn leaves pass her by,
her lips were wet with words left not to say.

Slowly she takes a step foward;
my heart stops and skips a beat.
My vision is seen through Love's red dye
the moment before lips and lips would meet.

Quivering anticipation,
she shares her passionate kiss.
And no matter how hard I would try,
I could never have braced myself for this.

As she breaks away from her kiss,
I stood numbly in cover.
Unaware I couldn't bear to cry
while she rests in the arms of another.

eh im going to post different poem

October Rain

You don't know how you make me feel, standing here next to you. Knowing that I love you, and hoping you love me too. The dark purple sky, with clouds all around. As the soft rain falls on us, and we listen to it's sound.

I wish it would never end, this beautiful October rain, because when I'm with you, I can feel no pain. As we lay on the ground, staring up at a star. I think of all the good times, and how we've come so far.

Had I only just known, it would be our last night. If someone would have told me it would be your last sight. I never would have let you go, as we walked around, and listened to the wind blow.

However now i'm alone, you're simply a memory. forgotten by all, all of course except me. I kept you in my heart, but it just caused me pain. As I tried to hold on, I started going insane.

I want to be with you, want to see you anew. so i found out a way, to be with you real soon. and as i pick up this gun, and hold it up to my brain. i'll never forget, that this is my last October Rain.

Oscar

We have some wonderful poems here... But I will be honest.. I have not even teared up yet. Some gave me chills and some were very sad... But, come on guys, I am heartless, or so I am told.

Make Me Cry!

xDarkSuicidex

EVERYONE:
Wonderful job so far! Some very nicely written poems up there! Keep it up!

It can be about ANYTHING. Make sure it makes me cry though! It has to be sad...Upsetting..Yeah. Write from the heart.

xDarkSuicidex

Bryan, I'll reserve you a place.

Dead Of A Heartbreak / How Can You Still Call Me Beautiful

With yesterday’s make-up
Smeared across her face
She shies away
From his loving embrace

“What’s wrong?” he asks
“Nothing, why?” she replies
“I just want to know why
Your make-up’s smeared under your eyes.”

“Oh, it’s nothing, don’t worry.
I’ll be alright.”
“No really, what’s wrong?”
What happened last night?”

She tries hard not to break down
Right in front of him
Her soul is shattered again
She tries to push the pain within

“You know I care, please tell me.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”
“No you’re not, you’re not okay
You’re feeding me a line.”

“If I were to talk to you
Would you really care?
After it’s all done,
Would you still be standing there?”

“Oh, honey! You know I do.
Why wouldn’t I be?
When ever have I not been?
It’s alright, you can tell me.”

“I love this boy, but he doesn’t care…”
“Are you sure about that?”
“I’m pretty sure; he never did.”
“Now, why would you say that?”

“Well, he lives too far away
He used to live near me
And we rarely talk anymore
It’s hard to deal with really.”

“Who was this boys?
Where has he gone?”
“No, I can’t tell you
My feelings are wrong.

He has robbed me of my beauty
Stole it from within
When I stopped seeing this boy
He took it away with him.”

“You know, I think you’re lying
Because you know I can tell
That looking through your eyes
You can see you’ve gone through hell.

You’ve been robbed of something, yes
But not what you speak of
Your beauty and grace are still there
So is your kindness and love.”

“How can you still call me beautiful
While I’m standing here a mess
My face looks so horrible
Plus, this torn and tattered dress?”

“Baby, you shine from within
Your beauty glows and shows
I can see past the make-up
To see the real eyes, lips, and nose.”

“You’re just saying that because you have to
Because you’re just trying to be nice
But this is too much to deal with
I can’t let this happen twice.”

“Sweetie stop…I love you dearly
You know this much is true.
I have always been there for you
And I really truly do.”

As she stood there stunned
Her knees began to shake
As she fell down to the floor
Her whole body began to quake

As he bent to pick her up
He noticed something wrong
Her eyes were staring upwards
Her gaze fixed just too long

He held his dying baby
As she slowly slipped away
“I love you and want to marry you…
I was going to propose Valentine’s Day.”

Through her last moments of life
She tried to tell him, with pain
That he was the boy she loved so dearly
But her efforts were in vain

Her body limping, without a soul
For as she slipped out of life
Her one last dream that couldn’t come true
Was just to be his wife

As her love held her body
That had once been so full
He whispered softly in her ear
“How could I not call you beautiful?”

After her funeral the very next day
The boy broke down and cried
She was his everything in his life
He didn’t want her to die

So as the boy walked home
A dove flew over his head
As he watched it silently
He remembered what she said

And as the boy looked down
To walk to his home
He thought he felt something funny
It’s origin, unknown

Then he saw it shining
Lying on the ground
Her favorite golden necklace
That he just had found

He wondered how it got there
But somehow, it led him home
Then he finally realized
That she had already known

She knew he loved her dearly
Of course she knew that was true
But he never even told her
“Baby, I really love you.”

As he sat upon his couch
The boy felt such an ache
His friends found him the next day
Dead of a heartbreak.

¤◦Ciao◦¤

Erased Memories..

The hardest thing,
For a little girl to face,
Is to just sit by,
And slowly watch her family be erased,

She would cry,
For nights on end,
There was no one to turn to,
She had not one friend,

She would watch her parents,
Fighting all night,
Her father slapping her mother,
Then she having to fight,

Her dad had a problem,
With drinking and violence,
He showed this girl no love,
He was the worst influence,

This girl would hold,
Her little brother tight,
Telling him it would end soon,
That everything would be alright,

She looked into his eyes,
His face filled with tears,
They bound for abuse,
They had so many fears,

This girl grew into a teen,
Her father got worst,
He was fighting with there mother,
Then he had a terrible out burst,

He came home drunk one night,
And he went for his wife,
He started beating her,
Then he grabbed the knife,

The girl stood back and watched,
But her brother made a mistake,
He couldn’t take it no more,
There were two lives that the girl’s father would take,

Then the girl took a knife,
She had no other choice,
She stabbed her father hard,
Until he had no voice,

She saw what she had done,
Then she started to cry,
She turned the knife on her,
That way all of them would die.

I'm sorry I took my poem out :$

x

In Memory Of Bev

In the dead of night
She let go
And her prescence wasnt there anymore
She loosened her grip
And let her life fly away
She had wrote on a piece of paper

"I had my share of good and bad
I need to let go
Im tired of being sick
And sick of holding on
Im weary of living a cancer-controled life
And knowing Im about to leave my family
Please dont be saddened
I need the best for me
Living off a I.V in a hospital room
Is too much for me to handle
I need to be free
Free of pain and the grips
Of a deadly thing choking me
Im weak and numb
So I need to be going
I wish good luck for you all
Dont grieve for me
Just be happy that Im not hurting anymore"

They found her on her bed
With her eyes closed
And hands crossed
A ray of sunshine beamed across her
From the opened drapes of the hospital room
She looked like an Angel

Tears I Have Cried
by ~~Lindsay Woods~~

I keep it in now, I m silent,
The reason is my step-dad was violent.
He left me with a black eye,
Now i start to cry.

The tears they won't go away,
I will never forget what he did that day,
I still don't know the reason why,
And again i start to cry.

I hope it doesn't happen now or then,
I wish he will never do this again.
He tells me everything will be alright,
But this leaves me in much more fright.

I go to school and act like everything is ok,
But i need to talk to someone and say,
He has done this before,
And now it hurts even more.

The tears they drip down my face,
I want to get out of this place.
It is hurting me inside,
All those tears that i have cried.

hey can u please leave me a spot??

thanks xoxo pHoEbz

bump

ChanceM--
As long as you think it will make me cry, send it in! =]]

xDarkSuicidex

You have a place, Chance.

Can I enter a poem I wrote tonight? It's about one of my friends childhood.. It isn't a friendship poem though

Anything goes, as long as it makes me cry!

xDarkSuicidex

Little Girl So Bad?

I'm just a young girl,
and don't understand.
Why my Daddy,
always raises His hand.

Days on end locked in my room,
my life so full of fears.
Although He hurts me frequently,
I have to hide my tears.

I try to be good,
I promise I do.
But still more beatings,
He puts me through.

I'm glad it's just me though,
He leaves my siblings alone.
He spares them from seeing,
He gets me on my own.

They all went out,
to a theme park today.
He said I'd been bad,
Home alone I had to stay.

I had to do the ironing,
the pile was so high.
At least I could watch TV,
to help the time fly by.

When they all got back,
He saw the tele' on.
He got angry again,
told me I'd done it all wrong.

I couldn't see the creases,
but I managed to stay calm.
As He took the iron from me,
and placed it on my arm.

My little sisters birthday,
I made her breakfast in bed.
I didn't do my Daddy some,
I guess He just saw red.

This was the first time,
I remember Mummy being there.
She didn't try to stop him,
I guess She too was scared.

She came up to me afterwards,
and asked if I was okay.
'Yes,' I calmly told her,
as She turned and walked away.

Then as I got older,
everything came to light.
Why it was only me,
who my Daddy would fight.

I believed everything they told me,
thought I was really bad.
I then found out the truth,
He was only my step dad.

Why did my real Daddy leave me,
when I was only three?
I guess I was bad then, also,
and He couldn't cope with me.

Now that I'm an adult,
I'm stronger than before.
Still the memories and unanswered questions,
hurt me deep down to the core.

Day By Day
by Marsha

Day by day I look out the window.
Hoping you would come back.
Even though I know you couldn’t.
You left me and mom before I was born.
After you gave her a ruby heart necklace she’d always adorn.
I knew you didn’t leave us on purpose because you left this world altogether.
Not a day goes by when I don’t wish you could be with us again, if it’s only for a short time.
Not a night goes by when I don’t hear Mom cry herself to sleep.
It’s so hard to miss you everyday Dad, because I don’t know what to miss.
I’ve never felt the warm embrace.
I’ve never felt the love that a Father can give his daughter.
I’ve never saw the lights in your eyes when I was born.
I’ve never felt the way it feels to have a father.
But I’ve always felt your love from heaven.
Day by day I drown in sorrow.
Looking out to tomorrow.

This is a poem written about an event in my life. Well, more like before my life, but hope you like it. It doesn't matter if it wins or not. Thx for reading. ttyl

Bump

Bump =[

There is ONE more spot left! I made a mistake!

We Are Waiting For:
youre acting like a d-m- saint {Reserved}
Broken Fallen Angel {Reserved}
FliritingWithDeath {Reserved?}
blissful-bearje{Reserved}

Come on guys... I'll give you a few more days. If I do not hear from them, I will message them in three days.. If they resign, we will then judge.

xDarkSuicidex

Not.So.Tough.After.All [lyrics]

Faking a laugh, faking a smile
trying to make my damn life worth while
it's making me weak, you're making me sick
please give me the words for the rest of this lyric

can you hear me crying, crying all day long?
can you hear me singing, singing this song?

we were meant to be, we had it all
but one day, you slipped your hands away, and on the ground i fall
didn't you hear me? your name i called
broken apart, shattered i lie, between us, a soundproof wall

i saw you flirt with her
she's everything you see in your cheating world
in front of me, you always did it
even your damn poses admit
why are you doing this to me?
what did i do wrong, that made our relationship break apart, so badly?

you seize me everyday
blaming me, is a game i don't want to play
but everyday you look at me, just like how you used to do
can you still feel the feeling the love i have for you?
i know you like her, even before you met me
but why treat me sh!tty?
is this my punishment, your revenge?
my life you'd avenge
full of misery and depression
we're over i already learned my lesson!

we were meant to be, we had it all
but one day, you slipped your hands away, and on the ground i fall
didn't you hear me? your name i called
broken apart, shattered i lie, between us, a soundproof wall

i saw you flirt with her
she's everything you see in your cheating world
in front of me, you always did it
even your damn friends admit
why are you doing this to me?
what did i do wrong, that made our relationship break apart, so badly?

fine you don't want to be my friend
that's alright, i want our relationship to freaking end
i don't want to hear your voice
i want to make my own choice
leave me alone, stop looking at me
what did i do wrong, that made our relationship break apart, so badly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*whispers* it's making me weak, you're making me sick, this is the end of my song, and my lyric *whispers*

i hope this is ok. this is like one of the sad poems i wrote (while crying) or watever. i hope it affects you.

Reserve for me

We Are Waiting For:
Noni Wang{Reserved}
Broken Fallen Angel {Reserved}
FliritingWithDeath {Reserved?}
blissful-bearje{Reserved}

Save for Noni, you have until my Thursday... For you guys have reserved those spots for awhile. I'll email them tonight, actually. Noni, you have until Saturday.. And judging will HOPEFULLY be on Sunday.

xDarkSuicidex

I wanna enter =)

if i still can? well newayz, heres my poem, enter it if im allowed plz. thnx

Are You Happy Yet?
(child's perspective)

I walk into your room
I see bottles on the floor
Brown, green, yellow
Liquid drips onto the rug

I see mommy and daddy
Not kissing, fighting
They're not hugging, mommy's crying
And you here feel like dying

You ever think I wanted
Something to hold on to?
What happens when I lose my grip...
Should I give up on you?

The bedsheets are bloody
And I can't find mom or dad
Just a knife under the bed
And you looking all sad

I feel guilty in a way
I want to yell at you
Tell you to put away the gun
There's more in life that you could do

But the temperature is rising
And I finally hear the car
Mommy's boyfriend's here with his bent up
Handmade guitar

He says, "Where's the missy?"
I say, "She ain't home right now"
He says, "Where's she gone off to?"
I say, "Don't have a cow!"

So we're all waiting
And mommy gets home drunk
She pulls a wad of cash from her pocket
And says, "Look baby, I made 50 bucks!"

I stare at the money and beg her to
Put it all away
"All I want is you, mommy!
Can't you please just stay?"

She says, "Aww, shut up! I did this all for you!
It's your future we're saving up for - a future for you!"
I say, "I don't want your dirty money,
you're breaking all the rules!"

Mommy stays quiet and wonders why I don't like it
Her boyfriend rubs her back and whispers,
"Let's smoke some hard stuff in your room!"
I scream and shout, then stare back at you

You there, why aren't you
Helping me when I'm down?
Don't you see my daddy's dead?
Some fellas knocked him out

How come in the hard times
You stay all quiet
And when I'm happy
You let me like it?

I'm telling you
This isn't what life's supposed to be
So, yeah, you, can't you find a way
To try and save me?

Sometimes I wonder if God
Really can see me
Because he always can
But I haven't felt his love lately

I ask for food
And they just give me dirty money
I want to go to sleep
And the more I cry, they beat me

So as I turn to walk away
Will you hold me close?
I want something to hold on to
Something to give me hope

My tears soak the rug
Like the alcohol before
And the place smells of rum
I hear people knock on the door

I want to leave
But I know I can't
Go away from
This prison I feel guilty for...

I'll accept yours, even though all the spots are taken.

We await 4 people....Noni of which I have heard is doing it...The rest, have disappeared. oO (=[)

xDarkSuicidex

Here's you Favorite one!! ^-^

Jade Eyes

Like tigers creeping among Asia's trees
Like the rituals natives sprout from jade debris
A sacrifice made from an innocent girl
Watching silently the ceremonial unfurl
Such a honor they all whispered in her ear
Once you leave, we shall show revere
Such a noble brave girl you've become to be
Upon your shoulder lies our humanity

They dressed her in gold satin and rings
They wrapped her in all the flowers of spring
Such a pretty sight, yet such a sad sorrow
She won't be smiling starting tomorrow
They guided her towards a temple of jade
They showed her where her sacred God laid
Take my hand, his voice full of charm
As long as you're here, there won't be harm

The giant doors creaked shut into the night
The little girl stared peacefully in delight
Surprising though, he caressed her chin
Then slowly kissed her with a sinful grin
Thank goodness the door caged in all sound
Or screams and cries would erupt all around

No, she did not smile the next day at all
Her innocence entrapped by Myanmar
She burned her soul to recieve vengence
Her eyes of jade crowded in brooding absence
Oh, they will die for using her to pay
For the loss of money from games they play

We await THREE people..

We Are Waiting For:
Broken Fallen Angel {Reserved}
FliritingWithDeath {Reserved?}
blissful-bearje{Reserved}

xDarkSuicidex

I changed mine, Jade eyes is the odd one among all my poems because it actually has a storyline. LoL

Whoooo, it IS my favorite!
And thank you for entering, once again.
I hope the other three show up...if they don't email by tomorrow I may just go ahead and judge...

xDarkSuicidex

sorry guyz i forgot all about it... hope this is ok xOxo

Porcelian Doll

Shes lonely, all covered in dust, mud stains in her dress.
Elegantly sitting on my shelf.
Shes watching me, with those deep, blue, glassy eyes.
Pale face, she seems so sad.
I wonder what she is thinking, why she is so afraid.
Standing on my tippy toes, I gently reach up for her.
I carefully blow away the dust, sit her down on the cold floor.
I turn the tiny, little, golden key, she plays her music,
Starts to dance for me.
As she dances, pictures, memories flicker through my head.
Her name is Lucy, how could I forget?
She was the one who came to all my tea parties,
The one who sang me to sleep all those nights, when mummy and daddy were busy.
She was the one who kept all my secrets,
The one who I understood even though she never said a word.
She was the one who stayed with me, on that first day of school,
The one who sat with, me when I cut my knee.
She was the one who taught me that it was ok to cry, ok to laugh,
The one who taught me to be myself, to never give up in my hopes.
And now she is the one I cry to when I thought all was lost,
The one I share my sweet 16th birthday with, Nanny and Poppy forgot.

We await TWO people..

We Are Waiting For:
Broken Fallen Angel {Reserved}
FliritingWithDeath {Reserved?}

xDarkSuicidex

Silent Death...

Poison vial in my hands....
Thoughts flowed through my mind...
I thought...
This is my time...
I can't take it this life anymore...
Why did everyone turn against me..
Why did everyone that i love hates me now....
Now i will leave...
From this world...
This lifetime....
Screw love...
Who ever loved me.....
NONE!!
Who ever caught me....
NONE!!!
I uncorked the vial.....
and took a final look around me...
Now let me leave from this place....
And drank every single drop of poison....
I grow weak....
I can't breathe....
I know that I'll be leaving soon..
I lie on the floor..
Waiting..
Waiting for my life to pass me by...
My final thoughts are....
You were my friends, boyfriend and family..
why did you betray me.....
now my life is gone and i am falling to the depths of hell....
It was my Silent Death.....

*srry bout tht.....but i know tht im not going to win but i did it for the hac of it soo enjoy!*

Ok.. I am going to judge this asap. We only have 1 missing person, but we do have 20 entries... So, as soon as I am free, I will judge!
I hope these are good poems (I am sure they are) that make me cry..For, I do not believe I am heartless. (Lol.)
IF there is no poem that makes me cry, however, I will either not give comments or I will take them down. The contest was, afterall, to make me cry.
Sound fair? I hope so...

xDarkSuicidex

bump

-Do not take these comments as personal attacks or against your poems. I did not see who was writing it as I read (I copy and pasted all poems into Word). Jesse ~ Squiggle Master, I love your writings and I felt bad, but it was my honest opinion. Forgive me.
`````````````````````````````````````````````

1st - )|x. Ba.ilz__&// *F[r]iends* Ok - Erased Memories..
Rating: 7
Very cliche, as everything here was, but this one actually gave me chills... I cannot explain why, either. It was the way you explained the family being earsed and forgotten...and I adorded it. This is the top poem; no poem made me cry, but this is the closest one with chills. AM I heartless?...
``````````````````````````````````````````

2nd - Noni Wang© - Jade Eyes
Rating: 6
Always an amazing write, Noni. You already know what I think of this poem, but it always deserves praise. It is beautifully written and simply amazing. The topic was very origanal which was a site for sore, sore eyes. Thank you for a wonderful read. It did not make me cry, this time, but it still made me shiver. Great job.
```````````````````````````````````````````
3rd - Oscar - October Rain
Rating: 5
This is amazing. I'll be honest, I do not like the formatting of paragraphs; I really think you should break it up, but that is only what I prefer. This was beautifully written, and though very cliche, it was still a different write. Does that make sense? Great job.
`````````````````````````````````````````
4th - blissful-bearje - Porcelian Doll

Rating: 5
I just really enjoyed reading this. Thank you for submitting.. The topic was VERY orginal; I simply loved everything about the poem. The flow was good, the formatting was not bad.. The only problem I have with it is I did not like how you phrased the ending (the rhyme and words choosen).. But nicely, nicely done.
```````````````````````````````````
5th - Adam - Grandpa's Chair

Rating: 5
This was just fascinating to me. There was not a lot of emotion in it for me, but I can understand how you could think this would make me cry. I did not tear-up, but I did think it was utterly sad. And it was very well written; great job.
`````````````````````````````````````````
6th - donna - Little Girl So Bad?

Rating: 4.5

By this poem, I feel like I am repeating myself. Better discripitive words and more creativity... And PLEASE use proper grammar. That bugs the hell out of me. This poem got one of the higher ratings because of the content and interesting way of telling the story. Nice job.
``````````````````````````````````````````
7th - *ςανίη mэ*-xxixlovexyouxx - In Memory Of Bev

Rating: 4
Interesting tos well. I like how you displayed it, though I really disliked the 'note' she wrote.. But, it was not too bad. It was the topic that got to me overall. Good job.
``````````````````````````````````````````
8th - ChanceM - "A Loves Past..."
Rating: 3
I am honestly at loss for what to say.. I did not like it, I did not hate it... there is nothing more to say. Forgive me. The reason it got one of the higher ratings was because it was more interesting than the rest.
``````````````````````````````````````````
9th - ღ¤◦Ciao◦¤ღ - Dead Of A Heartbreak / How Can You Still Call Me Beautiful

Rating: 3
I liked the ending, but it still did not even amuse tears to come... I did not really enjoy the topic; it is so cliche.. But, I am at loss for words on this... Use some punctuation and better vocabulary.
``````````````````````````````````````````
10th - Broken Fallen Angel - Silent Death...
Rating: 2.5

It was very interesting to read this.. I am also at loss for words to describe what I think of this poem... Forgive me. The only reason it got as high a voting as it did was because of the first few lines...
``````````````````````````````````````````
11th - By: ConCealedInAddiction - I hAtE yOu
Rating: 2
A very orignal topic. I however, did not like how the format was written; where are the semi-colons and periods? I suggest you put more punctuation in your poem; it would make it flow a lot better. The topic interested me, finally something new. All I knew I was going to get was lost love and abuse, but you changed the world for me. It did not make me cry, however, but it was very interesting. Good job.
``````````````````````````````````````````
12th - ~~Lindsay Woods~~ - Tears I Have Cried
Rating: 2
This was one the the best cliche written poems on the contest.. But, still cliche and it still didn't make me cry. Try using stronger punctuation and better describing words; your poems would be much more emotional thus.
``````````````````````````````````````````
13th - youre acting like a d-m- saint - Not.So.Tough.After.All [lyrics]
Rating: 2
The only reason it got a two was because it was so cliched and it could have been written better.. The first bit was very strong, but it tapered away, which really took away from the poem for me. Sorry. Ok job.
``````````````````````````````````````````
14th - ~*Who Cares?*~ - You Need to Eat

Rating: 1
Interesting. I understand this topic, for I have a past too, but I felt it could have had more emotion in it and you too could have describe better. It was interesting, though, and a different topic from everyone else's, which was a nice fresh read. Not too bad.
``````````````````````````````````````````
15th - Marsha - Day By Day
Rating: 1
I can see why this made you cry, but as I said to Bryan, it had to make ME cry...Which, with this I just sat here. I know it means a lot to you, but the format was broken, there was not good flow...I just did not like it over all. Sorry.
``````````````````````````````````````````
16th - ∫Bëløveđ∫ - Are You Happy Yet?
(child's perspective)
Rating: 0
This was poorly written. WATCH YOUR GRAMMAR. It was horrible.. It made me cringe. WORK ON PUNCTUATION. And that is all I have to say.
``````````````````````````````````````````
17th - ♥JeSS♥ ~Squiggle Master~ - Untitled Emotions
Rating: 0
Did you really think I was going to cry on this? I will be honest, I was almost smiling (I had fun music going on in the background as I read these) when I read this one.. There is no emotion in it and not enough describing words... Everything seems so bland. I just did not like it.
``````````````````````````````````````````
18th - Aken Sol - Passionate Kiss

Rating: 0
Ok, how in hell's name did you think this was going to make me cry? Honestly, did you really? I almost laughed reading this; not because it was badly written (it was actually nicely written), but because this has no sad emotion to it at all.. There is nothing sad about this poem at all.. To me.
``````````````````````````````````````````
19th - Bryan - Junior (Rest In Peace)
Rating; -1
This just...I understand why it means so much to you, but, Bryan, dear, I know you have much better work. But, I do understand that it probably means a lot to you.. It got such a low rating, because it has to make ME cry. I am sorry.
``````````````````````````````````````````