Angry & Confused

ive been with my bf for nearly 2 months and finally told everyone at work,most of them are happy for us but some staff have come to me and said they think i should be with another..they say that the guy i should be with has become very depressed after finding out about me and my bf..i got told that he liked me but i thought they were winding me up so i laughed it off..

was talking to the lads at work today and the guy i had an affair with (start of this year)(i was single) was there listening in and chatting too..he knows i have a bf and knows i would never cheat on him, but still he asked me when the staff left if i would go with him 1 more time,and carry on the affair! obviously i told him no-i just couldnt do that to someone i love.later on he grabbed me and pulled me near, and i told him no, pushed him away and left the room.afterward i told my bf what happened and he wants to say something to the affair but i dont want any more rhumours going around work.also, do you think he is just starting to hit on me again because im with someone and another wants to be with me?

so now im angry for the affair to be hitting on me knowing fine well im with someone..and im confused because i love my bf and i want to help this depressed guy but i cant see how i can help other than leaving my bf and starting something new, which i wont do as it would make things complicated at work and basically i would be ripping his heart out and standing on it!! and thats just something i cant do.

why cant life just be simple!
any idea's what i should do?

october xx

About half way through the second paragraph I stopped reading.
Have you ever heard of punctuation? And proper grammar? I could barely understand what you were saying and felt I shouldn't put myself through the agony of trying to read it all. Maybe someone else will.

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

wait wait...ok well that's good you pushed the "affair" guy away. i'm assuming you've already cheated on your boyfriend once, and that's probably enough ...haha, well you should never have cheated in the first place, but it's good you're not going to again. umm and so what if this other guy is depressed? you're taken and you love your boyfriend (i'm assuming). you can talk to him and tell him that you'd love to be friends and get to know him but you are in love with your boyfriend and you don't plan on leaving him (any time soon). i don't know. that shit happens all the time. people fall in love with other people who are in relationships all the time, that's no excuse to break it off with your boyfriend. he's depressed but it's not your job to 'cure him.' i don't know, have you been leading him on or something? if so, you should stop that. ok i'm really tired and i'm sure most of what i just said was really scrambled and all over the place. BUT that's my opinion. so best listen up! :P

as for the person slagging off my grammer...why even bother leaving a comment in the first place if i anoyed you that much!you could of just left and not said anything, im not going to argue about the do and dont on grammer but did you ever consider that there are alot of people in this site who have problems writting/typing, and arnt sure were proper grammer and punctuation go!

enough said.

to the person who actually gave advice.
ive never cheated on my bf..nor will i ever.
good advice-thanx..

october xx

but still he asked me when the staff left if i would go with him 1 more time,and carry on the affair!

^^^sorry, i thought that meant you had cheated already. i must have misinterpreted.

and i'm confused as well what exactly you are asking...what do you need advice about?

do you think he is just starting to hit on me again because im with someone and another wants to be with me?

im angry for the affair to be hitting on me knowing fine well im with someone..and im confused because i love my bf and i want to help this depressed guy but i cant see how i can help other than leaving my bf and starting something new.

should i just say stuff the lot of you and leave without saying a word..how can i sort this mess out?

the reason behind me runnig off and telling my bf is that i thought if i didnt there could be even the slightest chance that i would say yes to the affair, but if he knows everything then i make the chance even smaller, its hard to explain-i will always care for the 'affair' guy and i say to myself i wont ever cheat on my bf with him, but talking and actions are two very different things, im scared i will do something stupid with the affair and either i tell my bf,the affair does or someone finds out and tells him...and i think i just drifted from my own conversation...umm...oh yeah, if i can help it im trying to not be around the affair but its hard since we all work together.

i think that cleared some confusion..but i have difficulty putting my feelings into sentances..so if its still confusing let me know and i will try and simplify it..

thanx for your comment bob..but it isnt lust-(been there did that, got the scars on my heart to prove it)!

october xx

A good rule I have found is never date anyone you work with, that way if the relationship goes sour you don't have to deal with situations like this. (not at work anyway)

Other than that, all I can say is stay true to your bf and try not to let the other guy bother you. Blow him off, he'll get over it sooner or later. It's not your job to cheer him up. He clearly has no respect for you or he would respect you saying no.

You should never date someone who you work with. I've learned it the hard way and it complicates things between all of the other employees.

As for the "affair" guy. You should probably just keep your thoughts off of him because it was in your past and if you love your boyfriend then you should definately forget about him.

Depression is something I like to define as self-pity. Right now, he is feeling sorry for himself, and there is nothing that you - or anyone else for that matter - can do about it. He has to pull himself out of the depression.