the meatballs will dominate 2007. Hoagies... unite!

BABE!
DO U REMEMBER THIS
There was a farmer who had a dog that sang eee-i-ee-i-ohhh. And on that dog he had a farm ee-i-ee-i-ohh. With a oink oink here and an oink oink there. Here an quack, there a quack, everywhere a moo moo!!!!!!!

^^^^ You rock my socks.

Weeeee wish you some figgy pudding we wish you some figgy pudding! We WISH YOU SOME FIGGY PUDDING AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=]

i'm crying from laughing so hard.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

AHAHAAHAHHA A MOO MOO HERE AND A QUACK QUAK THERE
LMAOOO!

i hate not knowing what the joke is.

HAHAHA loser....

The joke is in itself, blondie.

Everything in those two paragraphs of what I wrote is beyond random and incredibly insane!!! Hahaha I wrote it on Christmas with Geo in the Depression forum because some people were pissing me off!! LOL!

I love you Geo!!!!

hahahahahahah i love you too sisi
=]
we were crying from laughing =] and u bloody made me sing it like a million times
"geo come on, sing it with me geo"
"geo, sing with me"
"GEO COME ON SING THE SONG AGAIN"
lmao
i love you!

LMFAO!!!!!!!
I MADE YOU SING IT OVER AGAIN!?! Nuh huh!! I remember -I- was singing it over again and again..
lmao but now that i think about it, I did kind of peer pressure you into singing it repetitively!! LMAO!!!!!! That was sooooo funny!! hahahahaha

I love youuuuuuuuuu Geo!!!!

yes
peer pressure
thats what it was
lmao
i love you TOO!!!!
U SHOULDNT PEER PRESSURE ME!!!! ITS UNETHICAL!!! =] HAHAHAHAAHHA.

and we love u

=]

Kerri dear, be online today/tonight...okay?!

And Sierra bebe you too okay??? important.

I love you both

I will try, my love....

except there's one problem:

Today I was going to walk to Rite Aid to buy some birth control pills.
Tonight, Donnie and I have a date at the movies again...how late are you going to stay up?? I don't have school today sooooo...yeah. I'll be online when you probably get home. I LOVE YOU!

HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAY CARLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE YOU BABENESS!

aaaahh what's going on ... so confused

HEY EVERYONE!!
stop the confusion!
personally im not confused but hey!!
i just got back from the gym!! hahahaha some hottie asked for my number and i sed no at first as a joke and he thought i was being serious! i felt DREADFUL!! lmao!!!! but hey he was funny looking. hot body. but funny looking.
ANYWAY
my buddy Laila is on her way overrrrr so i must go!
I LOVE U ALL LIKE WHAOAAA!!!!!! SERIOUSLY!
AND RACHEL! HEY I MISS U GIRL!!

XXXXXXXX

i'm still confuzled.

=] =] =] =] =] =]
hahahahahahahahhhahahahahaha!
Babe, thanks, i'll try that next time lol lol
GO TO SLEEP ur scaring me!!!!
I MISS YOU MORE!!!!!!!
love xoxoxoxox

carlee
why r u confused?!!!!!!!!!!!

YAY!!! I will most DEFINITELY join, babe!! hahaha what brought all this on???

Is it because of what happened with you and Shiky on this site with the mods and stuff?? Totally lame!!

i love you all

Si... what ended up happening? are you okay?

Um as of now...as of the past 30 minutes...
I went back to being..

well...

me.

I'm sorry.

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy girles! =]
I miss ya'll
Love uuuuuuuuuuu

what do you mean, "you"? si?

ahhhhhhhhhh

Me as in...I mess up a lot and become depressed for silly reasons. I've lost control over my own life and I constantly find myself doing and I become a burden on others. I lash out when I'm beating myself up as well and I have hurt everyone I love around me.

My dad isn't asking me to leave anymore. Instead, he now knows that I'm VERY depressed and he blames it on Donnie...and I LOVE Donnie. YEAH Donnie and I get into fights but it doesn't DEPRESS me because I know we'll always, ALWAYS end back up together so these silly fights are meaningless in the long run. But my dad doesn't understand that and he's not going to let me see Donnie until I get some help whether that's just a councillor and medication or just talking to a councillor. I never thought I'd say this but I'm TERRIFIED of getting help. I'm used to telling people that they need help and they should get it but now that I'm on the other end, it's an extremely odd and uncomfortable thing to stray from the self-degredation that I've always known. It's a terrifying thought to think that everything may potentially be different or what's worse...Even professionals may not be able to help me. Even drugs may not be able to change me. What if I'm immune to the best of what the world has to offer?? That scares me too.

So that's what's happening...
I USED to have real reasons for being depressed but now it's just a mental way of life. It's how I've been living and how I've been surviving. I don't expect anyone to even understand me anymore. I hate this crap. It sucks so badly!! UGHKGAJG:JAK UGH! I need Donnie. I'm so desperate and I need Donnie to be here, to take my pain AWAY. I need to BREATH and it's like this god forsaken town has just sucked all the oxygen out of me and stolen all my energy and used it against me!!

I talked to a girl in the hallway the other day because she's my friend in my Geometry class. Her name is Krystal. Well once she walked away to go talk to her other friends, Miracle and Vicky, they both slapped and hit her. When she asked why they were doing that, they mentioned me and told her not to because I was a horrible person and they don't like me. What's even more sad is that I've never said a word to Miracle or Vicky so how could they hate me. Well, I know that they're friends of Brittany. And Brittany was my first friend at school. Some stupid drama happened and in a moment of anger and depression I called her a backstabber because at school she let someone yell at me and she just laughed about it. Well I knew what I did was wrong, so I apologized. But nooooo, heaven forbid i have a moment where I'm human and make a mistake! She's all high and mighty and writes all over her myspace how great she is because she forgives others and she lives her life like it's meant to be lived and she loves and loves and prays and relies on mercy. Like she's so self-righteous but when the moment comes along and I apologize for what i know was wrong, she refuses to forgive. In fact, she blows it a thousand times out of proportion and goes to school and turns the entire student body, excluding Donnie, against me!! So now people who I don't even know are threatening me, hate me, and know ME as a two faced, backstabbing, overdramatic, b!tch. Which is NOT fair!!! AT ALL! This is a new school for me, even still. I don't HAVE an entire army like Brittany has! And I can't FIGHT her so why can't she just let it GO?!?! Ugh!! So my social life has been tossed out the window and I hate coming home because my parents are retarded and are taking COMPLETE control over me, which is never what I wanted!!!! I wanted to breath and live and be myself but I can't because it's not good enough for anyone here!

That's what's wrong, Carlee. That and I have so many cuts on my arm right now that Donnie told his mom that I cut and now she may not even let us be together or she'll call my dad and let him know and I'm not out to hurt anyone else. In fact, I'm trying to QUIT hurting everyone else but I keep stumbling over my own two feet and knocking everyone else down with me. It hurts....I'm, quite possibly, in the worst emotional shape I've ever been in. Every night I find myself looking for sharp objects. And Mary Alice and Dad let me stay home alone today so I wouldn't have to go to school because of the stress I've been under, and while they were gone, I felt so pathetic because I was searching the ENTIRE house for a razorblade. When I couldn't find them, I gave up and just laid down in my bed and cried. I'm horrible for what I'm doing to myself and others and I want to stop it but I feel out of control!!! I feel like I don't even know myself anymore. And I'll admit--I'm scaring myself.

Hey babe,
I read alla that yesterday,
It upset me =[ I hate to think you're going through all of that, and i hope it helps when i say that we are all here for you, i know that seems like its a tiny help when you need a lot of it, but more and more little help adds up! =] I hope you're gonna be okay my darling, I love you so much i always will you're gonna have to be strong for us okay?
If you believe in yourself sisi, believe u can be okay, you're almost half way there.
You're going through something rough babe and its not just going to go away because people tell you they are there for you, i know that, but it WILL get better, it'll take time thats all.
I love you so much and im always gonna be here for u to talk to you know that =] whether it helps or not.
You have things in the world some people only dream of.
REAL friends,
REAL love,
REAL strength.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Aww, Si... we are here for you.

And it is terrifying, getting help. and sometimes, ruthlessly embarrassing. But honey, if it's your only chance, take it. from what it sounds like, you have absolutlely none to lose and all to gain.

remember that once you hit rock bottom, you can only go up.

please try and stay away from those cuts, sweetheart - i know it's hard, but please please try. for us.

i love you so much. those two girls can kiss my ass. i'd kick their's if i was there.

lets take 'em on together car!!!
BRING IT BITCH!

KRISTEN!!!!!
Your poetry site WONT LET ME JOIN!
Ive tried like a thousand million times and i SERIOUSLY cant do it! It keeps saying
"Invalid session"
REJECTION GOING ON HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lol!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU SO HELP ME!!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I've had the shittiest day.
Its exactly two years today since i last saw my Dad, and..idk...i kept telling myself not to get upset over it because its only a DAY u no? Just another day which happens to be the same day as when i last saw him...two years ago. Ive tried to tell myself that but i think because ive told myself that so much its turned it into something, and now i can't stop crying!

It feels so odd, this time, two years ago, i was sitting at a table, in an indian restaurant, eating chicken corma with my dad opposite me. I wish i could remember more, the name of the restaurant, the conversation we had, things he said to me. If i had known that that would be the last time i'd see him in so long i would have treasured every single second but i didnt KNOW and now im making myself dizzy going over and over it in my head tyring to replay everything.

The craziest part? I didnt even KNOW it was today until i looked a few days ago on my OLD phone calender, i mean why did i do that????? And it seems like nothing can be normal until this day goes away, but thats the thing, this day will never go away because its gonna keep coming every single year and how can i forget it?????????????

Last night i convinced myself that it was gonna be okay, and i told my so called best friend at school that if im a lil crazy or upset or just distant then thats why, hoping that maybe she'd understand and make an effort to cheer me up a little? Even having a conversation with me would have been great. Like, understood, just a hug =[ =[

I started thinking about mine and her friendship in relation to mine and my dads relationship. You know, its like a miricle if i get a text from the certain friend im talking about. A phone call, well jeez thats like...an even MORE amazing miricle, that just doesnt happen. Its like shes too good for me, too good to take 5 seconds to write a nice text to me? I realised that the other day, when sam told me that she was on the phone (he got confused) and my face lit up because i thought she'd actually taken time to wanna talk to me =[ So texts and phonecalls? Well i dont even expect them anymore and thats really sad considering we're sposed to be close. Hmmm comments on myspace too, or messages on myspace, all these ways she can contact me, and if i DO ever get a comment, or a message then its like amazing. And that really hurts me because i shouldnt have to ASK for comments and messages texts and phonecalls from my best friend right? If she really was my friend they wouldnt be so....foreign right?! so damn unfamiliar. =[

its the same with my Dad, all these ways of contact and yet he doesnt bother. *sigh*

Two years!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!! hes my DAD and he hasnt seen me in TWO YEARS! i cant get my head round it, i never thought it'd be this long, and cause its been so long it'll be so akward to see him. I hate being so far away, literally and emotionally, from the people i love so much
*tears*

And the part thats tearing me apart is that he doesnt know, hes certainly not thinking about me and he has no idea that two years ago we were together eating dinner and laughing =[ Its so horrible it hurts so bad, i fucking HATE this day! I didnt tell anyone else at school, apart from the person i've already mentioned. Nobody else knows and i doubt nobody else cares. Sisi, come cheer me up and be ur usual amazing self =[

I love you all im just very emotional!

Ah... geo baby...

I wish I could tell you something that would make it all better, but I can't.

I wish I could say that I've been there and that it's not a big deal - but I haven't really. I can't remember the last time I saw my dad, and since I was about five years old at the time, I honestly can't say I care as much about my dad as you do about your dad.... then again, that's probably because my dad never cared about me either.

I want to hug you, but unfortunately, you're on the other side of the world... ::cyber hug::

If there's anything I can do, sweetheart, let me know.

I love you.

Carlee
ur the only person that has given me any support or any advice or compassion about it. a couple of my friends asked tonight so i told them, and they literally went "oh okay" and moved on.
I feel so alone.
I love you car.

I heard a quote about advice today.

It said "Advice is asking someone for an answer you already know but wish you didn't know."

No matter what happens, Geo, you're going to be okay. It's not "just a day." This is important to you, that much is obvious.

Whenever I have a really bad day, or a really upsetting day, I just remember this - suffering is on this earth to make us feel compassion. In other words, if there weren't bad days, we wouldn't appriciate the good ones.

It's all going to be okay, Geo baby. Your friends may not be standing behind you, but I know you, and you're one of the strongest people I have ever known of. You're going to get through this.

I believe in you, sweetheart. And remember, you're never alone - there's always us and there is always God.

Cheer up, beautiful. The sun will rise on a brand new day tomorrow.

hey, Sick. &. Tired., Edward Cullen is cheating on you, with me. No! I'm kidding. That would be mean. Even though I love him, you picked him first...no, bella did, but oh well. :D

..............random.

Edward Cullen is also MINE which you seem to be forgetting...=]

Carlee babe, i love you and your wonderful words!! =]

Kris, u still havent helped me with my PROBLEM regarding your damn website!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME!

Love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu all

ps. keep it at the TOP people, we're slacking

Oh gawsh, I remember reading about the Hoagies last year =D
Nice to see its still alive

Shirlz
xx

last year?!?!?!?!?!
YAY!!! =]
WHOOOOOOP!!! the meatball hoagies will NEVER LEAVE! your all stuck with us
mooohahahahahaha

This thread has ran it's course.