Hey....I need sum advise...Plzz Help me...

Hey,
I need sum advise on a new poem that I wrote...It's called " An Ever-lasting Want For Love" Plzz read-comment on it....tell if I need to make n e changes.....I would also wouldnt mind suggestions...
THANX!!

*~*Leanne*~*

P.S. If you wanna keep in touch with me,
I have msn~~ Jbl_smile34_09@hotmail.com
AND yahoo ~~ slipknot_fan43@yahoo.com
THANX AGAIN!!!!
XoXo