my sad emo love post

i'm so in love with this guy named Jake, and I have never been in love my entire life. i met him when i was sophomore in high school (i'm a freshman in college now) and i've liked him ever since then (pretty much off and on, off in the periods where i had boyfriends or didn't see him for months at a time) and we've done the whole friends-with-benefits thing, which i think damaged any chance of us being together. now he's attracted to one of my closest friends. is it unnatural that i'm jealous and saddened by this? he knows i love him...i haven't used the phrase "in love" and we're still friends but i have this horrible feeling that things are going to change. can i just be friends with him? sorry this is more of a rant than a question...but if anyone has any consoling pieces of advice that'd be lovely. and please i don't want to hear "get over this and dont post this shit here" pieces of advice because frankly i was put on a 51/50 last night and i don't need that right now.

oh and side note: the 51/50 wasn't because Jake, it was because of some severe depression.

ive been 51/50 before ..... like 5 times .. if you have ne qs. you can ask me about it ..

An actual professional definition: "5150. When any person, as a result of mental disorder, is a danger
to others, or to himself or herself, or gravely disabled, a peace
officer, member of the attending staff, as defined by regulation, of
an evaluation facility designated by the county, designated members
of a mobile crisis team provided by Section 5651.7, or other
professional person designated by the county may, upon probable
cause, take, or cause to be taken, the person into custody and place
him or her in a facility designated by the county and approved by the
State Department of Mental Health as a facility for 72-hour
treatment and evaluation."

Exactly!

I'll give you some advice [what I think] unlike these people above who are being rude. [Glares]

Now.
I believe that if you really love this boy, you should try to get him. [I hope I understood this post correctly, anyways.] You've been after him for years; so, don't you think it's time to try and give it a shot now? Ask him out, or, become close friends with him. Either way, what bad thing could happen? Everyone gets rejected once in a while; take a risk of love in your life. =]
I'd never say "Give up" because that's for people who never want to try. So, go for it and give it your best shot.
You may have depression, but that's not and shouldn't stop you from doing what you want. If you get turned down, remember, everyone does at some point. =]
Take care.

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

I agree with Ecstasy. You should go for it. Its not like anything worse can happen right? You never know unless you try. Best of Luck!

well I've already sort of "gone for it" for lack of a better phrase. It's already been discussed that he loves me, but in a completely platonic, friendly way....*sigh* thanks for all your advice/help/words of encouragement! I really appreciate it!

oh and metallichick and ellie, does it make you feel better to call that "mental"? insinuating that i'm crazy? The hospital was a ridiculous treatment I didn't need, I don't care if that sounds like I'm in denial. 5150 is not just for "crazies" but for people who are serious threats to themself or someone else.

I'm sure she didn't mean to imply that your crazy...she just didn't know how to phrase that in any other way? I guess..Oh, so sorry to hear that, but no worries I'm sure you'll find a guy just for you one day. You seem to be a pretty cool person.

Queen--
With all due respect, if you he said he loves you in a friend way, there's not much more you can do.
I'd wait it out and try to become his best friend; it is said that friends often attract [and more often then not date or have dated at one time.]
So, just be his friend, always be there for him, and show him what he means to you; that's the best thing to do right now [and maybe all you have].
Best of luck.

And P.S. You're not crazy. You're very sane and probably one of the smartest people here [notice everyone here is about 12]. So, pay them no mind. =]

xx

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

^^^
"Crazy" coming from the child that cannot seem to spell 'Your' correctly.

Lmao. [[Walks away shaking head]]

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

^spelling has no say on how right somebodys opinion can be.

Mattilichick or whatevre the friick your name is.. what is wrong with you? because someone is saddened by love, or cuts or wahtever. doesn't mean we're emo! You're extremely out of line comming on here and expressing your opinion were it was clearly not needed. She asked for help, not to be beat up emotionally. Leave her alone. I suppose you could say i'm crazy too?. ha well guess what?! then i guess i am. But you don't know her, and you don't know me. and Any other person you stereotype

Metallic whatever--
Shut up. You're young and thoughtless.

Get back to the topic of the post.

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

It is not unnatural that you're jealous, but I think it will get easier with time. He sounds like the kind of person you should just be friends with, and leave it at that. Best wishes.

metallichick, screw you. for reference, though the suicidal thoughts in my head can run rampantly, I have not hurt myself in any sort of self-mutilation in almost a year. you know what, maybe someday when you grow up and experience what its like to feel true pain, not just woe-is-me that cute boy in my science class likes the class slut, you'll understand. i specifically said that i didnt want anybody here to bash how i feel. i dont understand how its so hard to just keep your f***ing opinions to yourself.

oh and thank you jaime!

In this world friends stand by each other, and last longer together than lovers do.

Having said that, everyone wants to (well in most cases) be with the one they love. But it's not always possible. So? We can't let life stop. Even if we want it to it won't. We all move on eventually. What hurts to breathe now will be a dull pain in a month and will be a bitter memory at the back of your head in the next month. Time helps.

You being jealous is extremely normal. That should be a phase that should hopefully pass away. We only really need to think about our lives carefully, and we all will find something we love doing, something that gives our existence meaning. (other than love)

If he doesn't like you, don't be bogged down. You can still like him, but don't try to make him like you. Because then whatever you two would have wouldnt be real.

Instead, look at the fact that you have his friendship. This is, trust me, paramountly important. It's okay if you love him now. I can promise you'll move on. Just take heart, grab life by its horns and WIN!

Take care, Dhaval

PS- to everyone, ignoring metallichick and similar people, is the solution to not getting worked up because of them.

PS2- I like your name, Queen of Spades! :) Oh, and if given the choice, I'd choose friendship over love certainly. SMILE!

I take back what i said before, I didn't think people would assume that another person is crazy just because their put on 5150.

He loves you as a friend, thats better than nothing. Hope you feel better, Nana

Dhavel, that was beautifully put if you don't mind my saying so, and 100% true.

I'm really sorry to hear that your hurting so bad. I wish I could just come over there and give you a big hug. Just surround yourself with friends who love and care about you, and eat lots of Ice Cream, lol. Also, I know this isn't what you want to hear, but time heals all wounds. I know that isn't what I wanted to hear when I got my heart broken, but it's true, and, trust me on this one, someone else will come along and sweep you off your feet. (It happened to me, and nothing lucky like that ever happens to me!!).. So, *hugs* I hoped this helped, even just a little bit. And I hope you feel well soon.

Metallichick, have you ever been depressed? Do you know what it feels like? I've seen some of my friends go through it, and it isn't pretty. So unless you have been, please, leave her alone, I know nobody wants to be called crazy. It's not a very nice feeling, and it isn't helping her heal. I'm not trying to be rude here, to anyone. I just want you to get better, and be able to move on with your life. There is someone out there for you. And one day, he'll come and sweep you off your feet.

So get better soon Queen of Spades, I hope this helped. *Big hug*

What can I say except that I was in the wrong. I didn't mean to be rude if it came across like that. I'm sorry that that happened to you.

You know metallichick, I don't really give a damn what you've been through. Everyone has been through shit and someone who has really known what it's like will NOT beat someone over the head with it. They will be honest yet compassionate, at least that is my perspective. You're fortunate you've gotten to be so "strong" but some of us still have inner issues that we struggle with every day and can't just shrug everything off. Life's a bitch and what makes it bitchier is when people can only bring you down because they're life has sucked too. So because you've had a "bad" life you have to bring everyone else down with you?

to the queen of spades... your totally right metallichick has been through a lot.. but just because she has doesnt give her the right to make fun of people who maybe didnt have it as bad as her.... and i dont think your crazy at all... i mean you have problems but we all do.. and "there's a sick little suicide in all that we do" haha lol sorry thats from a song but i totally love it and its definitly true... and i know that the whole crazy thing was said a while ago but i just read all these posts now .. lol :D...

also about the guy you like... there isnt anything you can do to change the way he feels... maybe you just think you love him.. and your really better off as friends if you really sit back and think about it.. but i really dont know because im not in your situation... and if you say you do really love this guy and he is who you want to be with then join me in believeing "if it was meant to be it will happen" and yeah yeah i know i know.. its totally mushy gushy and cliche.. but i believe it 110% :D

to matallichick the queen of spades.. did not at one point say that she was the only one in the world having problems...she just letting people know that at the moment she does... and she asked to adive and/or someone to listen to her story... not at one point did she ask or even imply she wanted anybody's pity... so NO she is not the only girl in the world with problems... but so what.. does that mean she cant still be sad at times...

GOSH!! your really ignorant...

number one...I DO NOT CUT MYSELF ANYMORE metallichick. and number two I DID NOT ATTEMPT TO KILL MYSELF. and okay calling me "crazy" and "mental"...do you think that thats not hurtful? you don't even know the meaning of "crazy". "crazy" is what you see homeless on the streets of san francisco. "crazy" is something that people really don't understand. and i think its funny how you go on and on about how I'm a bitch and whatnot and then you wish me the best of luck? please...seriously. just stop posting, i think im stopping too. nobody can say anything on this damn forum without being harassed, its such a shame.

ok seriously i'm done with this post. but for reference: "marks on strong, that was pretty bitch. but whatever, im not the one killing myself." and i believe that was aimed towards me. and i just dont understand why someone can't post something on this site and not get frickin harassed for how they feel. if you don't have something intelligent or helpful to say then keep on your side of the computer.

Probably a good idea haha. Ok since I'm done having this ridiculous argument with metallichick, thank you very much everyone (sans metallichick) for giving me honest advice even though it may not be what I wanted to hear but I'm glad I received it. I think I'm just going to let him go, but thank you for the support!

wow that was very interesting.....lol...and to think i was gunna stop readin this....turns out ther are sum pretty screwed up ppl in this world[metalic-watever]but yes. i mean honestly how could u say that to sumone who has already been hurt metallichick.its wrong.

ANYWAYS.
i dont think u should let him go honestly. i think u should just keep trying....but its ur choice rele. IM SORRY!..
i rele hope everything gets better for you!

Just because someone goes into a mental ward doesn't mean they're crazy! you've got a lot to learn about life if that's how you think.