death is always near....

i am not suicidal but i have to wonder some times if that would make life easier , not haveing to live it? every where i go death follows, i have had 7 friends 2 older family members, my niece and a friends baby pass away in two years and its getting to hard to handle, i have been through counseling(sp?) and been through another program, but i cant seem to life the wieght off my sholders? can anyone help?

i know that i cant run from death because everyone dies but i am 16 i have burried 2 best friends and 4 other friends, all of them in there teens or early 20's. those ones arent tthe hardest one tho the loss of my niece ended in a sever bought with depression and a sever case of becomming a wall flower, i dont get close to people anymore because i fear there deaths, and i know i shouldnt do that but i cant help it!!!

i do go out and do stuff i am a soccer player and i am constantly running( like around a track) i am in constant contact with my recruiter and all that. i take a practice asvab once every two weeks or so and i go out with friends all the time ,i am only one here when i am at school, i just dont know, i guess i should try harder or want to be over it more? i dont know

to the poster...
i don'tknow if you are believer or non-believer and i don't know your religion but for me.
i believe that after death we have another life
an eternal one. if we obey God instructions as he
asked we enter heaven else to hell. so if you are
a good person you shouldn't be afraid of death like me^-^. also for dear friends that you buried i believe that God takes anyone life for a good reason but you don't know what it is. it may be a test for you to see if you will be good person or not, it may be better for the person who died that he died because maybe in future he had be suffering alot and like this. God has his own wisdom ^_^. although i never try to have the feeling of losing a dear friend.

well i believed once, things changed for me when all of this started happening