` Dating? `

I've talked to my grandma about letting me just try out 'dating' once.

But everytime she says no and she also tells the story about how dating involves

- running out with boys
- riding in cars with boys
- get influenced into stuff
- always out all night with boys.

Dating isn't all about that. Is it? I've been told it isn't all that it looks like.

Isn't dating like -

- going to the movies together
- walking around the mall
- skating together

or whatever else.

That's where you guys are going to help me.

What exactly is ` dating `?

its going out for a little bit to hang out with your bf for me and mine every friday night we go to a youth group sometimes we go out to them movies on saturdays its not what your gramma thinks i think she takes what comes from movies and it is nothing at all like that i know people who are 'dating' people and all they do is talk on the phone and see each other at school and stuff and i mean in my opinion that is seeing someone but either way dating is pretty much just hanging out not staying out late and getting influenced and all that stuff

:]
i love dating.
k. hun.
dating involves ALL that stuff.
but for me it's mostly movies, mall, skating, dinner.. so on. you get it.

it actually depends on what kind of person you are.
now, since you said what you thought it was... movies.. blahblahblah.
i'm guessing that's the type of person you are.
therefore, that's what dating is.

my mom did the same thing to me.
what i did was..
i asked her if i could have ' dates ' over at the house the first few times.
turned out being where i had them most of the time.
it was actually fun. :]
well, once she ' earned my trust ' i was able to go out with them.
so, maybe you should talk to you grandma about having someone over for a movie or.. uhh... dinner or something. lol.
& let her know that it's not about what she thinks it is..

of course, my mom is not you grandma. lol
so it might not be that simple with her..
but, i hope my advice helps..
and yuh.

good luck sweetie. :]]

It can be w/e you want it to be really.

It can be any of what you mentioned as example there. The things you do together is largely determined by what you enjoy doing anyway...except now you'd have some one to share it with.

You can't convince her to let you "try" dating once. In her mind...once you're into it...you're gone.

She may love you and may be worried that you will leave her... and she still might be worried about the boy???

Has she ever met him before?

Yes she's met him many times before.

He's not one of those guy's you think he is. Yeah he may be in a 'gang' but he's asked me to help him out of all it! And so far he's doing so good.

I mean I just want her to understnad that nothing is in my mind about what I said before.

Then sit down and talk to her about it.... a nice little talk... chances are she will give in

Well when someone really doesn't understand what I'm saying I tend to get all mad n that.

So I'm afraid to actually sit down with her because I'm afraid that I'll get all mad and hurt her feelings all over a little thing.

Dating is all of that =)... Yes you ride in a car with boys... but only because he's taking you someplace nice =)

Yes you get influenced by boys =)... it's not *always* good, but it depends on who you ask, and alot of the time it opens your eyes and you veiw the entire world differently

Yes you *sometimes* spend all night with boys... but they have parents too that expect him to be home, so normally the reason you're out is because he takes you for a walk on the beach or to look at the stars

It's just about what you let happen to you... you're not going to ride in the car smoking joints, being out all night partying and being influenced to try drugs like some parents might think... not if you don't want to... Just tell your grandparents that they should trust that you were raised to know the difference between right and wrong. =)...

For me personally?... Dating is able to be with someone and hold their hand and hug them and hold them close when you laugh/cry... It's about taking them out to a movie and dinner... and taking to dances occasionally... you will have arguments, but if you're strong enough you'll get through them together, and it makes your bond that much greater =)... Eventually dating will blossum into love... hehe... but baby steps first darlin' =)

I tried telling her that she raises me differnt then what my mom n dad would have. But she just seems to stick to the fact that dating is 'bad'.

just gotta be more assertive is all.. if anything.. if that doesn't work.. hehe.. do the secret dating thing =)

Just tell her you're going out with a friend, and make the friend your boyfriend. You're not lying this way and you still get to be with your boyfriend.

I don't think you should lie about it.
How old are you? 14+ should certainly be able to date, and I can understand a parent's reasoning for not letting them go out if they're younger
But if you are older, then its just ridiculous. I'd say, if she wont let you date and you're 16 or older, then tell her you're gonna do whatever the fuck you want? mmk?

I'm 14. And my grandma can trust me because I always call when I'm not going to make it home or if I can't call I'll make myself come home an hour or two before I have to come home to gain her trust back. I have enough sense to not go running around in cars with boys. The only guys I do ride with is my grandpa or my friend Dan, (but I REFUSE to ride with him after he's had a drink or two, he gets a little 'wild' while driving; etc: might get picked up for weaving down the road, etc, etc).

I ain't as stupid as some people think 14 year olds are. I've grown more mature since I've gotten into high school.

So..

Well I can't really say that I've had that much experience with dating myself =P The little "dating" I have done I just started off by hanging out around town, like walking around looking at stuff, and stopping at stores to look around and pretty much just having fun then after a little while, if I knew that I wanted it to maybe turn into dating then I introduced him to my mom and dad as a "friend" But I'm all for doing it in secret if you have to =)
Maybe the reason your grandma doesn't want you to start dating is because she's scared that your going to get hurt or something bad might happen to you. I know that my mom and dad are afraid that any guy I start to see is going to hurt me in someway =P They just don't want me to get hurt =P
I'd go for it if I were you =) Let her see that he's a good boy and that he makes you happy when your around him and she'll come around =)