Be Here

------------------CLOSED-----------------------RESULTS AT BOTTOM

Live To Love Another Day ; By: Vanilla - The first stanza alone held so much depth, it was amazing and it really pulled me into the poem. You did a great job with word choice and imagery as well and not once did I get distracted from the poem. There was one or two grammar mistakes that caught my eye but nothing too serious, I quite enjoyed reading this. :]
SPELLING - 3/3
GRAMMAR - 4/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 4.5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 18.5/20

You're My Better Half ; By: Nikki - Your poems all have great potential, you just need to spend more time editing them. You should write them in Microsoft Word so that it can catch up on your grammar and spelling mistakes...or download VersePerfect, it's great and can really help improving your work. Aside from editing, you skipped around a bit in the poem and that really stuck out to me. If you have a lot of ideas bouncing in your head for a specific poem or poem idea...instead of bunching them all into the one poem together, write them down and use them in a different poem. Your imagery was okay...could be a little more descriptive. Don't get me wrong, I did like this poem and it has great potential, I hope to see more of your work improving in the future. :]
SPELLING - 2/3
GRAMMAR - 3/5
CONTENT - 4/5
FLOW - 4.5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 15.5/20

Better Life ; By: Sheena - I absolutely loved this. Your creativity astounds me, it gets better every time I read a new poem of yours, I am literally left speechless, I don't know what to write :[ . Lol, your imagery was great, it really painted the picture into my mind, your word choice was very good as well...but I did notice one thing, with "arch way" I think it should be "archway" all in one word, that's how I write it but the other way is fine as well...guess I'm just trying to find something to complain about to make me feel better lol, good job Hun.
SPELLING - 2/3
GRAMMAR - 5/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 19/20

Making Memories of Us ; By Italian Stallion - Aweeeh! You have a real talent for love poems Deary, never let anyone else tell you different! Every new love poem that you write is so unique and these days it is hard to find a unique love poem, but here is one right here. :] I really enjoyed reading this. :]
SPELLING - 3/3
GRAMMAR - 2/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 19/20

Tonight I Wanna Cry ; By: TheWorldFellNUWerentThere - A poem like this is very easy to relate to which is a good thing because that is what a lot of readers look for when they read poetry. The flow was kind of off, however...especially with the last line; it kind of stuck out to me. Instead of how you have it, you could shorten it up a bit with something like "So just maybe/If I cry hard enough/You'll come back" the / representing new lines. I don't know, just something like that so the end line doesn't throw your poem off. Other than that, nothing really stood out to me. This was a really good work, your poetry is improving. :]
SPELLING - 3/3
GRAMMAR - 4/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 4/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 1/2
TOTAL - 17/20

The Hard Way ; By: Ciao - Wow, Deary...you sure know how to tug at my heartstrings, lol. This was amazing, the story line behind it, your word choice, the imagery...everything! You never seize to amaze me, I have tears in my eyes and I am left speechless after this one, very good job! :]
SPELLING - 2/3
GRAMMAR - 4.5/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 4.5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 18/20

Country Comfort ; By: Dixie - I loved how this took me back to another place I love these kinds of poems. I did think that it could use a little grammar, though and it kind of skipped around but nothing too serious that it bothered me to the point that I couldn't even enjoy the poem because I still did really enjoy the poem lol. :]
SPELLING - 3/3
GRAMMAR - 4/5
CONTENT - 4.5/5
FLOW - 5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 18.5/20

Nobody drinks alone ; By: Espoir*failed - I really love your word choice and imagery. The flow was a tad off though and your sentences and the way you carried your sentences on was a little weird, I think with a little grammar it could really bring it together. I liked the allusions you brought into the poem, great job. :]
SPELLING - /3
GRAMMAR - /5
CONTENT - /5
FLOW - /5
FOLLOWED RULES - /2
TOTAL - /20

Days Go By ; By:Broken - I loved the imagery, it was very strong. I do think you should take a few more minutes after you write a poem to edit and check over spelling and grammar, that would really bring this poem up. Great job all together, though. :]
SPELLING - 1.5/3
GRAMMAR - 2.5/5
CONTENT - 4/5
FLOW - 4.5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 1/2
TOTAL - 13.5/20

I Could Fly ; By: SecludedSerendipity - From the beginning of this poem to the end of it, you kept me reading and interested. I find it hard to come across those poems these days, they're all the same or just don't call to me...but this one really did. It goes along the lines of what people will do for love and it is a very touchy subject; one that you have done a great job of turning it into something amazing. Great job, Dear. :]
SPELLING - 3/3
GRAMMAR - 4/5
CONTENT - 5/5
FLOW - 5/5
FOLLOWED RULES - 2/2
TOTAL - 19/20

I'd like to reserve, "Making Memories of Us"

Thanks Joe

Tonight I wanna Cry

Please&&Thankyou

It says nothing whether it has to be new or old. I have a poem called "Better Life - Eden" and I really liked it. Would that be sufficant to turn in, or should I choose another? =/

Thanks.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex

Can i please reserve your my better half, thanks

I don't know if it is what your looking for but here it is, i hope you like it

YOUR MY BETTER HALF

You are my better half,
in this love we share,
but now theres something i have to say,
something i have to declare,
you are my world, my rock,
without you i would not be here,
with you being next to me,
i have nothing to fear,
if there is a problem,
you see the best in everything,
it is like you know the answer to my problems,
you have taken me under your wing,
you keep me here,
and keep me safe,
you make me want to,
never leave this place,
your my better half,
for being there,
for helping me through life,
and showing that you care,
without you,
i do not know where i would be,
you are my better half,
and that is what i see.

by Nikki

Please may I reserve Country Comfort. Thanks

Dixie

Nobody drinks alone please

Yes Sheena, you may enter that I will reserve you.

"I Could Fly", please. XD

Thank you, Jenna. =]
``````````````````````````

Better Life - Eden {Quadruple Triolet}

A golden arch way of flower scents,
Walk through to arms opened wide.
A truth of purity and simple hints,
A golden arch way of flower scents.
Deep within the arch you've went,
Following precious steps of tide.
A golden arch way of flower scents,
Walk through to arms opened wide.

The forbidden fruit you must taste;
Take it in your hands with much pride.
A better life was put to waste,
The forbidden fruit you must taste.
Cover your sin with delicate haste,
When you strayed from the guide.
The forbidden fruit you must taste,
Take it in your hands with much pride.

We were shunned to the middle Hell,
A nasty place They call Earth.
A dark and sickly tale,
We were shunned to the middle Hell.
A stomach retching wail,
As to this retched place god gave birth.
We were shunned to the middle Hell,
A nasty place They call Earth.

Could not live the human race;
A better life we once had.
All we are are god's disgrace,
Could not live the human race.
With emotion we were faced,
Yet once life wasn't so bad.
Could not live the human race,
A better life we once had.

--------------------------------------

A Triolet is a poetic form consisting of only 8 lines. Within a Triolet, the 1st, 4th, and 7th lines
repeat, and the 2nd and 8th lines do as well. The rhyme scheme is simple: ABaAabAB, capital
letters representing the repeated lines.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex

Making Memories of Us
by Italian Stallion

Holding hands, cuddling close,
Whispers of "I love you"
Kisses and hugs follow too,
While sitting out on the coast.

Sharing this view with you,
Is absolutely breathtaking.
I couldn't ask for anything more,
For my heart is simply aching.

Making memories of us
Is what we're doing now,
As we sit and discuss
Our soon to be wedding vows.

© Copyright 2007 By: Italian Stallion

Tonight I Wanna Cry

Everything you've said,
Crossed my mind,
Over and over,
Nothing else comes,
And nothing leaves.

I remember every spoken word,
" I'm sorry,
But it all has to end,
It's not working,
I've found someone new. "

Tonight I wanna cry,
And let the teardrops,
And every broken piece of my heart,
Fall into the endless darkness,
Of the lake below me.

Maybe if I stand to close to the edge,
Just maybe you'll come back,
Maybe if I whisper to the wind,
Just maybe it'd change your mind,
Oh please, just please.

Tonight I wanna cry,
Tear away my beating heart,
To stop everything,
From falling away,
Just maybe, if I cry hard enough you'll come back.

The Hard Way plz

The Hard Way

It was 3 o'clock in the morning when your car ran off the road -
How are you going to deal with carrying your heavy load?
You almost killed four people, going around that turn;
I guess this will have to be the lesson you will learn.

You had no right to put them in that type of danger,
It wasn't fair to them and expecially for her.
She's bruised now, and her neck is sprained -
How long did it take you to finally explain?

Why were you driving with no license to your name;
Did you think that this was all just a game?
But I guess you lost your privlidges today,
Too bad, I guess, you'll learn The Hard Way.

Country Comfort

Honeysuckle on the vine
Drives to the county line
Sipping on homemade wine

There's big mouthed Bass
Beautiful stained glass
Soothing sound of blue-grass

A moonlight promenade
Sweet iced tea or lemonade
Listening to crickets serenade

It's simple as a front porch swing
Listening to the wind-chime's ring
Relaxing in the breeze of spring

Warm feel of a cotton T-shirt
Grandma's homemade dessert
I love this country comfort

Dixie

Nobody drinks alone

That smile with its all too familiar falsities,
And those shadows casting plays with
more drama than my life.
Candles flicker,
My stomach gets sicker
As i remember what I saw.
Chemicals are more dangerous than they ever were before,
And my bet's on
the losing horse.
But if A exerts a force
onto B.
Then B exerts a force
onto me.
But Newton told me that,
And i'm asking him for a big, fat
whisky. And I'll drink it to you.
I'll close my eyes
and (won't) feel you kiss me.
Now this house has become a cold home
And my family, a broken unkown.
Yeah I'm telling myself,
So much for,
Nobody drinks alone...

This is now closed,
judging will start once I'm done my homework.
:]

I'm so sorry I didn't get this done. I had a bit of a family emergency, and couldn't get on here for a few days.

Sorry again.

Tis fine, I've been a bit cramped with Psychology and History..haven't started judging it yet, still doing the Princess one...if you want to get it in before tomorrow or the next day, you can. Sorry about your emeergency though, *hugs*
:]

Really? :O Thank you so much!

I'll write it just now. :)

I Could Fly
by SecludedSerendipity

I could grab my wings and fly away;
Wake myself up to a brand new day.
I could leave you lonely, broken, scarred;
Leave you a life of which is oh so hard.

Yet you're my baby, my precious love;
My whole world held firmly in your glove.
A dreaded grasp you have over me,
Keeping me faithful for all eternity.

Leaving you, it doesn't bear thinking,
Even when you put me after your drinking.
Sometimes I'm like some rotten dirt on your shoe;
You leave me so heartbroken, unsure of what to do.

I could grab my wings and fly away,
Wake myself up to a brand new day,
But instead I'll stay, for better or for worse,
Leaving fatal love as my dead-end curse.

No problem at all Hun, wouldn't be the same contest without a poem of yours to read :] lol.

This is now closed, judging will begin in a few minutes, results will be posted later tonight or tomorrow afternoon.

First: 10 r/r/c + faves if not already there
Second: 8 r/r/c + faves if not already there
Third: 6 r/r/c
HM: 3 r/r/c each
Everyone else: 1 r/r/c each

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

This was very hard to judge, there were many in my head as I was reading through that I was like "Wow, I love this!" I changed my mind a lot on who the winning poems were, went back and reread the poems...but, these are the results...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

01. Sheena: Better Life
02. Ciao: The Hard Way
03. Vanilla: Live To Love Another Day
HM. Secluded: I Could Fly
HM. Joe: Making Memories of Us

01. Sheena

-1. Take Out Some Insurance, Baby [DONE]
-2. You Can Take The Time To Masturbate [DONE]
-3. The Autopsy [DONE]
-4. Gunpowder And Lead [DONE]
-5. Find Me a Shortcut to a Blessing [or Maybe Just Your Kiss] [DONE]
-6. Don't Hurt Me With Your Paperclipped Lies [DONE]
-7. How A Resurrection Really Feels [DONE]
-8. Being A Poet [DONE]
-9. I Pledge Allegiance to the Noose {Triquatrain} [DONE]
10. A Schizophrenic Can Fall Too [DONE]

02. Ciao
`
`
`
`
`
`
`
`

03. Vanilla
`
`
`
`
`
`

HM. Secluded

` any [DONE]
` any [DONE]

HM. Joe

`Any [DONE]
`Any [DONE]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

01. Broken
`

02. Dixie
`

03. Espoir*failed

`Prostitute (and all the stereotypes that come with it.) [DONE]

04. Nikki
`

05. TheWorldFellNUWerentThere

`A Picture Of You [DONE]

Hmm.

A Picture Of You

please&thankyou.

You can do any of mine, for I'm not sure what you've commented on of mine *Smiles*

Thank you muchly for the HM. :] Congrats everyone else.

Please do my newest. :)

[Hypervenilates.]
1st? Wow...Just... Thank you. xD I'm so ecstatic! Eeeee! =]
And.
Wow.
Congradulations to everyone else.

Um. I guess you could do:

-1. Take Out Some Insurance, Baby
-2. You Can Take The Time To Masturbate
-3. The Autopsy
-4. Gunpowder And Lead
-5. My Give A Damn Busted
-6. We're All Just A Little Bit Lonely
-7. How A Resurrection Really Feels
-8. Being A Poet
-9. I Pledge Allegiance to the Noose {Triquatrain}
10. A Schizophrenic Can Fall Too

And if you could do me a favor.
Read the those and PM me or something and tell me if you like my writings better now, or when I did form writing. Can you do that for me? It's a lot to ask, but I'm curious as to if my form writing was better or what not? =/. Thanks, doll. I value your opinion.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex

Sheena Love,

Please make sure none of those titles are for any of my other contests. I think... My Give A Damn's Busted, and We're All Just A Little Bit Lonely are.

<3

Hey, thanks for doing everyone, could you please do

Prostitute (and all the stereotypes that come with it.)

thanks
xxx

Any of mine thanks