My blog

I just can�t do it anymore. I am falling apart it�s like I can�t turn to anything or anyone anymore. The friends that are true to me are either taken away by my parents or by death. I have been trying to stand on my own but apparently I am not strong enough to go on my own. I fell to the floor and decided not to get up so there I sat but then I start getting pushed against the corner a constant pressure from all sides and angles are there jus pushing me and I can�t run away as much as I would love to �..i just can�t. Each breath I take is so thick barely breathable this time when I close my eyes things don�t disappear they stay there and get worse. At night I am tormented by nightmares and by the day I am worn out physically, emotionally, and mentally so I become delusional as well as tormented by life itself
My restless body can�t handle it anymore.
Suicide has come up a lot in my mind but I consider suicide selfish and wrong, but if there was a way to make myself disappear I would take it instantly I am so confused
Usually my whole body would fight the world but now my own body is fighting among itself as well as the world how can someone save me from myself?

.......I am lonely

I know you’re right yes there are things that are horribly wrong in my own house that I would rather not share I cant let it out here in my house so I write out everything to get it out on this site I know ppl have it ten times worse but I am scared about a lot of serious things that are going on in my life………well thanks for the advice

Hey,
well hunn i think you need to talk to someone who just simply doesn't know you, perhaps someone on this site, and tell them your problem. sometimes it helps..really. just to let it all out. and it's easier if it's someone who's not really in your life so they can't judge you or use it aginst you in some way.
I don't really know what to tell you..you seem like you're really just trapped. but you can get out. i know you can! =] you just really have to try as the post above says ^ to look at the good things..and let out the bad.
but first i think you need to just tell someone, anyone. to let it out. (and art always helps too Laura.)
if you'de like to talk just PM me.
best of luck hunn. i really do hope it gets better somehow..you don't desrve to be so down.
--Viola

Good advice angelina. the whole crying whining emo thing is overrated.... be individual, the worlds not that horrible unless you are just a negative person and make it out to be that way.

What is so horrible about this place? youre a beautiful girl, smile and make the best of life.

I know things could be worse but this is whats up with me yalll wanna know a little part of my life then here yall go
being pretty isn't always a good thing trust me ...but thanks for the posts
I was 7 8 and 9 I was molested by my grandfather then I saw my cousin commit suicide then my bro started doing stuff and almost killed himself in many ways (when my mom gets stressed she comes to me) I used to be homeskled then I went to public skl in 7th grade I met a boy in 8th grade and he was the first boy I trusted ever since I was molested I fell in deep love and offered him everything then he was just using me to get to the girl he really wanted (my best friend) I was just a temp until that girl came back to skl that hurt I started cutting myself then other things started happening 2 of my bros are fixin to go to iraq (I have 5 bros) and now I am really jus feelin alone I am not a normal person so I dtick out it is my wish to be unique but along with that I get the outcast feeling I know I chose the road I took but I guess I am suffering the consequences there are a lot of other good things that came out of my life but then there are a lot more bad things that no one will ever know about……but I guess its just life right?

Look i know i am not the only one with probs and it took alot to write out whats wrong with me but anyone else just wanna talk about thier lives and probs just write ur own blog