So now that the dates are officially finished...

... what do we do now???

Im bored again

Buy a dog.

Sheesh, Kevin is in a sour mood. I think he expected a massive orgy, and the rejection has turned his lovely heart to rot.

Abby seems upset too, which I find somewhat ironic.

I'm bored, and I'm disappointed that abs and Kev had hissy fits about their precious plot lines not being followed. Tis a bit sad when people used to being in control lose their power and flip out.

But what have you been up to Mo? Do you have horses? What are their names? Say you were to follow Kevin's lame advice...what kind of dog would you buy?

Finally...

^ Yoked? Arrr. Twice as intelligent and beautiful? Both, among many other outstanding traits. Thanks for taking notice :)

Animals require patience and understanding. There is no such thing as a mean animal. They kill when they need to eat, so don't give me some lame response like, "Oh, but I saw this lion kill a zebra once and it wasn't very nice." There perhaps are exceptions, but very few. Although I think it is possible to be friends with a grizzly bear, Grizzly Man (if you saw the movie) was incredibly disrespectful, testing his limits constantly. I would have killed him too.

Animals also have incredibly 'sensitive senses' (not to be redundant). A wise man once said, "never attempt to ride a horse if you are not in the pleasantest of mind." I think humans once were able to communicate as powerfully as animals, without words, but words have numbed us to our other senses. Haven't you ever heard of animals being able to sense your fear? It's very true, and I think humans are able to sense fear as well, but our senses are obviously much duller.

Also, there are extreme differences in communicating with animals, especially when considering prey or predator, and the animal's present circumstance/environment. Looking most predators in the eye, not only will your pupils dilate, but as will theirs...big mistake. That is basically asking an animal to challenge you at a fist fight. Take a horse for instance, as another example. When a horse licks its lips (this is also common in other large prey/livestock animals), drops its head, and gets what I call "the old man look" in its eyes...that means, "You're the boss. I respect you. Tell me what to do." One more thing...consider a cornered animal. Nobody likes being cornered, and if you're trying to earn an animal's respect, ALWAYS give them enough space and the opportunity to run away. Without their feeling of safety, you will earn nothing--and will probably end up being hurt.

So I could go on...but I won't.

Next question?

I never got interviewed by Kevin. ~

None of us have been yet. I'm trembling in anticipation. Shaking in me boots.

Shivering your timbers?

Gah! I need a pirate break!

Fear not, your pirate life as ended. Review the latest posts on our Date thread.

Me own life as a pirate 'as jus' begun.

Yes, ears. That's a big one for basically any animal that...HAS..ears. Flattened ears almost always are threatening. Erect ears are very attentive, perhaps preparing for flight. Ears changing directions every few seconds are curious, trying to communicate, or overwhelmed. Ears that are droopy hint at sickness. Then again, some animals have permanently droopy ears.

You can tell when a bird is sick by its wings. Droopy wings, just like droopy ears, are not a good sign.

Wow - Jane it appears we are one and the same people! We both ride (and none of that fancy pansy "Im a girl, so I just LOVE horses - I ride every Saturday with daddy and I wear my £200 jacket and my boots are always shiny... eww... my horse just did a smelly poo - how disgusting" type crap) - REAL riding - catching, bridling and riding bareback, becoming best mates with your horse and understanding it. Worming, hoofing, getting kicked in the shin and having a leg three times the size of your normal one for three weeks and still loving and riding it. I also agree with Grizzly Man - what a toss pot. He deserved to die - so disrespectful. I think I might go buy that one episode on dvd just to watch it again. :)

To answer your 99 questions... I grew up working on a horse riding ranch in Australia. It backed onto a nature reserve (which has now been taken over by houses - very sad, I actually leaked water out my eyes when they closed that baby down... anywho). First I couldn't afford my own horse - as I was at school and working for free. But then the owner gave me my Trevor darling - beautiful thoroughbred but stubborn like a mule (almost more stubborn than me)... and such attitude - would kick anyone else that tried to catch him - he was such a sweetheart. Canter on the spot, jumped, he'd ever rear up when I told him - which made me look really good - like the woman from snowy river or something. Then I got Donny - he was Trevor all over again but 10 years younger and twice as fast. He was also a little shit but in a beautiful way. Would spend hours talking to him - and he'd just rest his head on my lap and pretend to sleep like I was boring the shit out of him!! haha.

Anyway - Im in London, my ex-boss has them on his new farm and I miss riding to bits... BUT I won a horse riding tour through Wales the other day so Im doing that weekend of 25th August! WOOHOO. If they put me with some inexperienced gits I'll scream - but its free so Im happy to just get on a horse and feel relaxed again. *sigh*

The closest thing I have now to Trev or Donny is my 125cc dirt bike... which kinda gets you out and about and it is fun, but its not the same without the relationship.

And if I were to get a dog, I think I'd have to get about three or four... I have a dog in Australia (my mum's looking after him - Bandit - he's a jack russell and SO full of character - I talk to him on speaker phone sometimes and he runs around the house into every room looking for me and then runs to the phone and gives it a lick before running somewhere else to find me :( But other dogs I'd love is a Staffy, Rotty, Rhodesian Ridgeback (the one with the yellow eyes - they're amazing). So then I'd have four dogs. And someday 2 horses... then all I need are some chickens, a few cows, sheep and a corn field and I'll be self sufficient... I wonder what happens to your poo if you eat nothing but corn?

And did your friends get worried when you started taking young girls dressed as boys to the bathroom all the time too?

Mine did.

Your poo would start looking like deer poo. But actually, that is a very interesting question. Why is deer poo, horse poo, and cow poo so different in size, shape, and consistency when their diets are generally the same? My guess would be their digestive tracts. Pellets, chunks and patties...Oi.

Yep. I'm a real rider. I've trained every horse I've ever owned, even made a living for half a year, training and selling horses. Worked as an Assistant horse Vet. at a racetrack, but I'm sure I've already mentioned that a few times, hahaha. Speaking of rearing on command, I trained my older mare, Bizja, to rear AND buck on command. I'll try to get some pictures tomorrow, maybe post one up here as my avatar. Heh. Unfortunately, the commands to make her perform both skills are very subtle--my mistake as a trainer--and inexperienced riders tend to have issues with that.

I'm glad you're a real rider as well...don't know many these days.

I love Rhodesian Ridgebacks! Like Boxers only more refined and...better.

When I buy my own house and start making a family of pets, I figure I won't have less than 2 of any animal. It's got to be hard being the only one of your species in a household. I have a love/hate relationship with chickens, so it's undecided if I'll ever have any. You mentioned cows, and let me tell you...A month ago, I started nursing two black baby calves, only a few weeks old. The cutest, most awkward creatures you will ever see! Ah, and they buck! Adorable...

I'll probably have some kind of bird, but not caged. I like the idea of having a hawk on my shoulder, or arm, able to fly around freely, but still come back home for food and affection. Can you imagine hittin' the trails on your mighty steed, with some crazy pet bird flying next to you? Okay, I admit it, I'm a little weird. A lot weird. but you'd be jealous.

I want 4 horses, a miniature horse, two donkeys, a couple emus, maybe an Iguana, a crow, a garden snake (those green, cute ones), an alpaca or three, a bunch of dogs, a dozen cats, a rat, and who knows what else.

I believe an emu's eyeball is bigger than its brain. I know that's the case with ostriches.

Seven? You would have enjoyed the experience at eight.

Most definitely. When I'm 80, you'll be dead. But that's not my point. When I'm 80, I'm going to be the "Crazy Cat Lady." Some kids will poke me with sticks and chase my cats...but those kids will be the stuffing in my Sunday pot-roast.

My parents used to get so ticked off at me for bringing home rescue animals - I'd always swear I would look after it and let the vet take it to a rescue home if he owners didn't turn up... but I'd always end up having a tantrum and trying to punch the poor guy that turned up to take my rescued dog or cat away from me.

Yeah I'd like to also have a squadron of chipmunks - they're so cute! You can have your Hawke... and I'll have an entourage of animals following ME riding down the laneway like snow white (except I'd probably be named something more appropriate like Corn Poo or something).

The consistency of the poo has to do with the intake requirements of the animal - thats why their crap is all so different. Suppose it has to do with surface to volume ratio of the animal (bit like heat intake and loss)... rabbits have higher water and heat loss because of their size so they'd have more dry and pellet type poos than say a cow... just a random guess... Maybe we should make a thread dedicated to poo and we can all debate on it.

Yeah, seriously...If you don't know your shi*, what do you know? I like your theory though. You're probably right. I'm just kind of a whack job. Simple things make no sense to me, complicated things do.

Wait, a chipmunk squadrant! Oh man, I have to see that. I'm stealing a few for my own pleasures...I will stroke one in my hand, crouching in a cave, repeating with a lisp, "My precious...my precious..."

About squadrants: When I was in Scotland with my family and my sister's boyfriend--My sister, her boyfriend, and I all have fairly nice cameras--my dad was our designated driver, so whenever we came across some place worth taking shots of (quite often), my dad would pull to the side of the road quickly and yell, "Camera Squadrant, attack! Go! Go! Go!" And we'd jump out of the car like trained military women (and man), shoot the scene, then hop back into the car and go, all in about 30 seconds. Good times, good times.

I used to breed and sell Gerbils when i was a lad. Had I been born to a rich family, it might have been horses, but alas, working class hero that I am, it was gerbils.

I got quite into it too, had about 54 at one point, all different kinds, big angry black Russians, very aggressive...small and delicate Lesser Egyptian gerbils, and of course the standard Mongolian gerbils..one of the few, as I recall that doesn't mind coming out during the day. Man, I made some serious money back then..and of course learnt alot about responsibility, business management and life and death.

I gave it up when i got my first Paper round, and also, it doesn't do to have your room smelling of rodents when you start to invite the ladies around to playing Mariokart, you know.

Umm... Jane - this is actually quite scary... I used to do photography and did a lot of wildlife shoots - Kariba in Zimbabwe, Kruger National Park in SA etc... and you ride bikes, and horses, and we both love simpsons... umm what ELSE do we have in common? Is your sister's name Gareth? That would be freaky cause thats my brother's name!

Her name is Gail. Which is still too close for comfort. She wants to change it to Gael, which is even closer to Gareth. I better tell her not to now.
Kariba and Zimbabwe? That's awesome! I do love Simpsons, but okay...this question is the question that will determine all questions...and questions...

Family Guy or Simpsons? If you had to choose...

Ok well Im just a newbie to Family Guy - but Simpsons I've watched religiously since the very first episode... so I'll have to go Simpsons - BUT I love the humour of Family Guy - its totally different humour to Simpsons. Its a hard one - I never really cared for King of the Hill or that one with the robots so much...

King of the Hill and the Robots one should be burned in eternal Hell Fire. But first we must create a firey abyss and dub it, "Hell."

I agree with the latter of what you said, if you couldn't tell...but being a hardened student of Family Guy, I must...NOT choose Simpsons of the two.

As I said - its just that Im a padone in the area of Family Guy - I already want to have a baby just like them tho! (Well.. not YET... but when). Imagine always having a baby plotting your demise! Hilarious fun for the whole family.

By the way - you should tell your sister to just go ahead and call herself Gareth - she may as well - we're obviously being morphed for a reason.

Hahaha, I just realized we completely ignored Kevin's post.

Alright...gerbils, huh? I wouldn't have minded the smell personally. I had about 15 mice at one point. Cute little things, they are. What kind of sissy girls were you bringing over anyway? You should pick up the hobbie again...start rollin' in the bank ;)

Mo, I'll mention the idea to my sister, but no promises.

Kevin... you told me last week that you just got rid of the gerbils a couple of months ago and now you're saying that you got rid of them cause you were inviting ladies home to play mariok....... oh....... sorry.... late bloomer. :)

And as for the best female jockey in the world... who WOULDN'T know her! I used to want to be a jockey and its not like I grew up too tall or anything... I just loved dessert too much... kidding... I just like to ride at my leisure and enjoy myself - I did win a few races against the rival horse ranch workers quite a few times tho when I was a wee lass. Sorry... I meant when I was weeless, but then all the toilet breaks started to interfere with my racing. You know how it goes.

It may be odd, but I'm fond of the smell of sweating horses. ~ ~

My favourite scene in family guy is the painfully protracted one where Stewie starts asking Brian questions about the book he's been writing for years...and he just keeps on going and going and going..in this freaky monotonous voice...

"So hows that book you've been writing ay, got a good protagonist uh?..got a little love interest there in the 3rd chapter...huh..does she die at the end?...uh....got a nice plot twist for page 67...huh?...got any interest in it?...huh"

You had to be there.

-sorry I was in a foul mood... well more than usual! :)

"So hows that book you've been writing ay, got a good protagonist uh?..got a little love interest there in the 3rd chapter...huh..does she die at the end?...uh....got a nice plot twist for page 67...huh?...got any interest in it?...huh"

You had to be there

^ Oh...but I was. I've seen that episode at least 3 times.

I have two favorite parts in Family Guy...I mean, two parts that I will always remember...because they were from the first two episodes I had ever seen. (Best moments of my life). The first...I was scanning the channels like a ninja, when I stop at a random channel (which turned out to be Family Guy). The protagonist of the show was in a Conference room with a few of his underdogs, overlooking his employees hard at work in a gigantic room--cheap labor--about 50 feet below. He asks a bodyguard type guy, "Where is Fifi?" The bodyguard guy unzips his duffle bag and hands the protagonist a miniature white poodle. He strokes it, then suddenly someone slides open the glass window, he throws the dog out, is handed a rifle and shoots it. All in about 2 seconds. You can imagine I was like, "WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?!?" And started crying, I was laughing so hard.

You had to be there.

The other part is just as boring to explain, so I won't even bother.

Sibylline, I love the way horses smell too. The combination of their sweat, and that wheaty, dusty, musty scent. The best smell in the world.

Speaking of jockeys, I was asked to be an excercise rider by about 15 trainers when I was working at the track. I'll probably try it out next summer, but the whole waking up at 5:15 am or earlier is a turn off. Funny. My first horse was a tiny Arabian ex-racehorse. I used to gallop on the trails bareback, racing my friends, and usually guys about twice my age. He was a fast horse, that one. We always won. I miss him...

Ciao.

I missed the date thing by a few minutes ;)

Wtf...?

Haha - you crack me up Miss Sam.

I've never ridden bareback, it sounds a little psycho to me, I mean it's hard enough riding with saddles and stuff on, and dangerous enough...surely only a mentally unstable person would do this for fun?

**Cue my gal**

It's not just fun, it's the WAY. The way of the true horseman. Connected, rider and horse. One. Ahem...I mean, it builds up your thigh and butt muscle :) Plus, it saves me the guilt of strapping torture devices to my horse. No, I guess cinches, bits, headgear, improper saddle fitting, stirrups flapping around...they aren't so bad. But I do feel better when I ride bareback. Like a Native American. An Amazon warrior.
I don't deny that I am unstable. Same goes for Mo.

KEVin, do you ride bicycles with a helmet? By the way, nice phalic imagery with the new avatar.

Hell no, wearing helmets impedes my senses and is more likely to get my killed, but thats different, a bike doesn't jump around, it's not alive, whatever Richard Thompson might say.

I mean, what do you hold onto? You must have leg muscles like iron...I pity the man who tries to take you on and gets on your bad side....are you the lass they based Xena Onnatop on in Goldeneye?

Do you look at guys like horses? YOu know assess their breeding, their build, their stature, you know, before you get interested in them?...

Ah my ever changing avatars...yeah I found this ace lightsabre effects program...I'm changing it now though to a more sober, reflective me...mature, you know a moderator poet picture.

Pensive. Handsome too.

"Hell no, wearing helmets impedes my senses and is more likely to get my killed, but thats different, a bike doesn't jump around, it's not alive, whatever Richard Thompson might say."

^ Yeah, but a horse being alive sometimes makes it less dangerous. If you drop the reins and look away for a minute, your horse isn't going to crash into a tree or fall over.

"I mean, what do you hold onto?"

^ A combination of the horse's mane (which has no feeling), gripping with my iron leg muscles (more like aluminum), and balance. Balance and communication are very important. Sort of like riding a motorcycle. If the bike leans a direction, lean with it, not away. You pretty much want your spine to stay perpendicular with your horse. Well...for the most part.

You'd be surprised Kevin - riding bareback you actually have more balance and stability than riding with a saddle. You could go at a flat tack gallop with legs not even gripping the horse - you just go with the flow so to speak (as long as your horse has a smooth canter etc)... my horse used to canter on the spot which meant no uncomfortable trotting with no stirrups is a pain in the front bottom (excuse me - but its true - those whithers are bloody hard!).

Jumping is more difficult without a saddle but once again you get to feel your horse and know his mannerisms.

Well I get horse riding lessons every time I got to Poland, and I'm getting better...i can make the beast jog around and I'm cool with that..I'd love to go much faster but they never let me...I also got to drive a racing carriage last time I was there, which was bout 2 weeks ago..and that was ace...the horses though, they don't watch where they are going..they stare at each other!!...which is crazy...

Anyhoo, pity we aren't closer location wise, none of my friends ride horses, and I learn much faster with people I know...say, why don't you come back over to Scotland just to teach me to ride eh? What an offer!!

I'll teach you to play the drums, or guitar or bass..or...well, em..tai chi...or, em...Kung Fu...

Umm... Jane - did you just call me unstable?????

*cry*

I didn't think you knew me that well... :)