All Cutting, self harm threads - post here #8

You know your crazy when you run a bunch of cutters off.lmao.

Your not crazy im online then off then on again.

i think im going crazy thou, i cant even look myself in the eyes (in the mirror) when ever i do i feel so fake and empty like i've hidden away so long i dont even recognise myself.

Just remember that your past experiences shape you into who you are. and if those are bad youve learned to deal with that situation. Basic survival. So each bad experience you survive through can acctually be considered badges of honor.Cause no matter how much it hurts you you have still been transformed into a stronger creature.So its like scars at first there all red and they hurt but after time they grow ugly but tough.Like me.lol

Lol im sure your not ugly like my demented arm lol. its not the past that bothers me, i know that most of it was my fault and i get that, the stuff that wasnt i think im passed its the thoughts in my head. i think what im thinking makes me crazy.

I know exactly what your saying cause i mean have you ever just looked at yourself and said aloud what you think?I did and said wow im fing insane lol.

Lol no actually its more what im thinking is controlling some part of me and i look at myself and feel ashamed and like im not even looking at me, like im protecting myself from myself. like i do to everyone else. the thoughts scare me, i can admit that coz i dnt know you guys. maybe its a passing thing it only strated today, the stuff in my head. its always so full and swirling so maybe this is just another thing thats gonna be in there.
the "thing" is suicide btw. and im really scared.

I know where you are right now i've almost killed myself 4 times by cutting. And i used to be scared of those thoughts by when i accepted them as part of me it got alot better, cause i felt like i was in control of my insanity.

I know where you are right now i've almost killed myself 4 times by cutting. And i used to be scared of those thoughts by when i accepted them as part of me it got alot better, cause i felt like i was in control of my insanity.

I have never tried to kill myself and im kinda careful with my cuts but today I've had the thoughts off killing myself in my head, like okay that would kill me, what about pills? hmmm what would i write in a note? will they ever know about my poem? wll i be missed? that kinda stuff, like im already planning it... but i dnt think i want to die but i duno, i mean if i was to die in an accident right now i don't know if I'd say i wanted to live.

You describe my own thoughts, but I figure as long asthey remain thoughts, that is a good thing. We can think all of the crazy things we want, what matters is whether or not we have the ability to control that action, I am still here so I muct be doing something right. I think everyone has a bit of crazy in them, how could you not living in this world?

Time for a new one...locking