Rape

This doesn't really fit in with love and romance, but...

so i have a serious problem.
my boyfriend is currently in jail for like a week or two for some complicated reason, something about finding a suitable place of living and such.
well while he's been in there I've found a group of guys [my friends brother and his friends] to drink/smoke/party in general with, which i started doing almost everyday. even though most of the guys like me and are attracted to me, my friends brother is very protective of me and watches things to make sure no one touches me at all, and he never does. well one day we had some brandy, way too much it seems. i was with my friends brother, one of his friends i had just met that day, and that guys girlfriend. i and my friends brother, who knew we shouldn't have drank brandy what with the fact tht neither of us can handle ourselves on it, were REALLY messed up. i could barely move. well us two went upstairs to chill and at some point, he walked back downstairs or away or something to do something, and his friend came into the room and took advantage of the fact that i was too messed up, and he did what i now realize was rape. at first i thought it wasn't because i was too drunk to protest, but now i realize that doesnt make it consensual. this is not the first time ive been raped [but it is the first time while drunk]. my friends brother is aware of this now and i guess put a hole thru the house's wall trying to hit his friend after what happened. the friend hasnt shown his face around our group of friends since even though me and my friends brother are the only ones who know why. there is half of me that wants to tell my boyfriend what happened, but the other side of me doesn't want to because i know he'll want and possibly try to kill this guy, and if i convince him not to do anything about it, it will eat him up even though its not his fault. i can't tell anyone about this because i dont want it to be a big deal, i want to pretend it never happened, i dont want to press charges or anything. i dont know what to do or who to turn to and i have noone i can trust not to tell my boyfriend or anyone else about it. can someone please advise me on what to do?
btw i know drinking/smoking is bad for me and probbaly the reason this event happened, i dont need lecturing about that.

Hes not really my friend, hes my friends [ex] friend. i had just met him that day. i dont think i could press charges though, i couldnt do it. besides, at this point, i have no proof, it happened the 18th of august [which is actually my boyfriend and i's anniversary, horribly.]

I dont know... if i do, it's gonna be hard...

I think you know what you need to do hun
You just need to draw on some inner strength.

Yeah but theres no proof or wqitnesses

He doesnt know.. yet? and yet, prof and witnesses are becoming needed because so many girls falsely cry rape

Thats what i thought, until i read an article about such. it's called gray rape. being too drunk to protest doesnt give consent.

Ahaha, yea, i read it in cosmo. innocent men? some, maybe, yes. this guy? no. he wasn't drunk, he'd had a little to drink but could handle his liquor. his freaking girlfriend of over a year, whom he lived with, was downstairs [he's cheated on her before]. and furthermore, as crazy as this may sound, this was all set up by him. he knew my friend cant do anything but lie there when he drinks brandy, which was convenient cause my friend is a biiiig guy. me, they all know im a lightweight and the only reason nothing happens to me is because my friend protects me. and the guy kept insisting on brandy and finally convinced my friend

That sounds like rape... but then again if he was your friends friend or now x friend whatever its up to you to press charces some girls don't want to relive the fact of the rape and keep it quiet and nothing every happens to them but the guilt of it because they haven't told anyone...

I'm afraid that if i try to press charges it will be a long painful process and if it doesnt go through, and he doesnt go to jail i will have bigger issues on my hands.

Girl u need to press charges before he finds some1 thats like 12 or something and rapes them