how miserable he makes me

this guy and i went out for 8 months and did the whole "O I love you so much, lets get married" crap. He treated me like a little kid sometimes and didnt trust me about one of my friends, but still- we were "in love". Its been over for 6 or 7 months now and like everyone always says, he promised that we'd still be friends, that didnt happen. Long story short, he never talks to me and on the rare occasion that he does, he's really mean.

I don't really want to be all buddy-buddy with him, but i don't know how to get him to realize how much he hurts me. He knows that I've had emotional breakdowns from some things that he's done, he's seen my cry. now I've started cutting myself and its not all about him but he's part of it and i dont know if/how I should tell him. I'v become such a bitter person since he started treating me like this it would make me so happy for him to finally see how miserable he makes me

Casey, I'm going through almost the same thing as you, I went out with my bf, and then we split up about a month ago, we'd slept 2gether, and he was my 1st. He'd promised me we'd b mates coz apparently 'im a great girl'. Wtever. bt now i cant bare not even tlking 2 him. I saw him in twn 1 day with 1a my best mates, and he was tlkin 2 her, and she sed how he was a flake sumtimes, especially with girls, and he just coodn't admit it, he was like, ah cum on, im reeli not that bad! He has no idea how much he hurt me either, bt after a while u get used 2 the fact, and its taken me a shorter time than you, bt trust me huni, u will get over him, u'll find sum1 else hu will treat u alot better and u'll wonder y u did all tht just 4 one guy

Unless you can completely disconnect your emotional ties from this guy, you are never going to be able to move ahead with your life. It is more important that you become your own best friend and try to learn how to enjoy life than to stay miserable just to hold onto some faint hope that he will somehow acknowledge responsiblity for the pain he caused you. Sadly, it sounds like he is not concerned about your feelings. That is something you really cannot change. People are what they are and not what we would like them to be.

Valuable experience can always be gained from our past mistakes and failures. You said that he treated you like a child and mistrusted you, which should have been red flags pointing to his controlling nature. That is probably a good indication that in the future you should avoid guys who have a tendancy to be controlling. They DO NOT make good relationship partners. And in the long run you can probably consider it to be your good fortune that you won't be spending your life with someone like that.