All Cutting, self harm threads - post here #10

Sorry to hear about your father, my prayers go out to you and your family.

Drinking is a choice, you have a choice whether or not to pour that alcohol down your throat. I am a recovering alcoholic. Just like cutting it is all addictive. If it has become that seriious you cannot do it on your own, you must seek professional help. We can offer advice and voice our own stories, but to stop you have to work and that means seeking help from a cousellor or someone of that nature.

When you are happy, remind yourself what yuo hate to be reminded of.
if you dont like who you are, ask yourself why
if it is anything about appearence, you need to tell yourself that appearence is only one feature
if you cut to take away the pain that no-one could possibly know, start a diary and take up a sport to physically drain you
if you cut because your life is not the way you want it to be,reality check, lifes never perfect accept it and put the blade down
if you cut because you are sad, laugh more
convert your cutting into art, writing, drawing, sports, socialising
dont cut because you think it helps
dont cut
if you want to quit all you need is will power and a king sized block of chocolate!

Hi i have been cutting for about 5years now on and off..the last time i cut was in july. and i feel myself wantting to cut again. im just afried that one day ill end up cutting to deep. somtimes when i cut i don't even realize im doing it.. does anyone have any ideas that would help? i've tried many diffrent things. so if anyone has an idea plz let me know
Skylee

Well i can't give u advice on how to stop, coz i dunno myself but, if ur scared u'll cut 2 deeply then when u cut make sure u don't crowd one part ov ur body (that was my mistake) next if u cut filled with rage ur more likely to cut deeper so try letting out the rage by punching something eg. pillow or by screaming then if u still wanna cut do but u won't have all the rage so u won't cut too deep.
Lastly but sooo not least wat r u cutting wiv, a razor blade etc will cut deeper because it's sharper so get 2 know the 'weapon'
eg. wen i use scissors i hav 2 press harder but when i use a knife a gentle swift line will draw blood.
hope this helps.

Okay going back to what trixi I think said..."about starting a sport to drain you"
1.) I don't think that works, I was in the marching band and we had more physical exercise then the football team. I would push myself because of the pain and the hurt, I would run till I couldn't breath. I would almost black out. So I don't know if that is the greatest idea. Also, if you do start a physical sport try to stay hydrated. In marching band they were all like "your so weak, you don't need water" if you stepped out of the block for water. Though it is important to stay hydrated. I mean I would go for hours without water, and like I said before I would start to black out.
Anyways sorry Hannah about your dad, I hope things turn out for the best. For you its the same as cutting, look at yourself in the mirror and remember how you don't like to see yourself out of control drinking. How it can kill you! It is terrible for your liver... anywas and then think I can do this I can get through this... I dunno if this will help I'm not an acholoic but I don't like to drink either so.... I"m just going off the knowledge I have... You need to talk to someone. Someone in person, a counselor, a peer, someone. If you don't bad things can happen and will probably. No one wants to see that happen. So please consider it.

Help me.....

I have a big idea on how you feel. I cut my wrist too...I want to feel pain like other people but my pain is so intense and i feel a release when i put the razor to my wrist.People only say it doesn't help but If you ever need to talk I am here to talk to you. Only if you want to talk.

If anyone is reading this, i have only been cutting for a couple weeks and im terrified someone will find out but wish someone would at the same time does that make sense???

^ that makes perfect sense...
i dont know if this is what you're thinking but ... its like you dont want them to se because you dont know what they'll think, or u know what they'll think and you dont want them to freak out...
but at the same time, you want someone to notice and freak out because you want to know that someone cares... or because u want help, but u dont wanna ask for it...

again... thts just what i was thinking

That is exactly how i feel
i am so scared that im going to be thrown in a psych ward or something!
I constantly wear long sleeved shirts and i dont know how long ill be able to take the stress of hiding it
i started getting temped to cut about a week or two before i did
i would walk past the bathroom and be so tempted to grab the razor and about a week ago, i couldnt resist it anymore

I know this isnt exactly what u'd want to do... but i really think u need to get help...
getting help is the only way i stopped
my friend ryan saw them and told his mom, who told the principal, who told my mom
u'd think tht the mom would be the worst part, but she was speechless, so it wasnt tht bad
they got me to start seeing the school counselor... that is seriously the best thing that could have ever happened to me...

anyways... back to the topic, i really think that is the best thing to do right now...
either that or try to cntrol your impulses, i kno u already are, but just see how long you can go without doing it...

Okay, I'm sorry that you are having impulses to cut... but you've only been doing it a week..I'm sorry but I don't have much sympathy for people who do it for attention so if you are then just stop it. Now yes it does make sense. I doubt that they would put in the psych ward unless you try to kill yourself, or your parents make arrangements for it.

^ thts it though, she scared tht her parents will freak and put her in some 'helpful' place

at least, i think... cuz im not her...

I do it when i have an argument with my bf and when im really hurt.

Im still getting thru the shock that i did it in the first place
before i cut i would hit myself or bite myself
i know that i hate myself and i deserve the pain
there all so many things in my life that i feel are crashing down on me
cutting makes them hurt less

Life is more depressing as it progresses.Nothing makes me happy anymore.Pain is the only way to escape reality.Besides for the pain in my life there is nothingness.just 1 meaningless event after another.And i think it will be over soon.and that is the only relief i can feel is knowing that soon all this will be done.And i can finally sleep.

I read some of your poems and they are amazing! Dark, but amazing! As for ending your life, Ive thought about it many times(everyday) and the only reason i havent is because of my family and friends. I feel like im alone alot of the time but if i take the time to look around i feel crowded. it just depends on perspective. For all you know, life could start looking up tomorrow and you wouldnt be there to witness it. Just think for awhile and youll realize there is alot to live for. Keep in mind i know i am a hypocrite sometimes because i usually feel alot like you do. sorry for talking at you but its hard to know a life could have been lost and i could have stopped it. i know its hard but try to hold on a little longer. Im sorry if you didnt want advice. I talk/write alot obviously.

Does anyone have this problem:

i have been an SI-er for like 5 years on and off(i say self injurer because i dont just cut, i scratch, hit, punch, pull hair, burn etc) and my mother found out over the summer, actually i dont know how it took so long- i wouldnt ever hide it because i was at that point of not caring who saw, or what happened.. and she freaked out. but now she like uses it against me. like we get into a fight and i go upstairs and she'll yell up: ""hey do i have to come up there and get rid of your razor blades and safety pins or are you going to be able to control yourself."" and i am trying to stop, and that makes it worse, she makes me think of it constantly. which makes it worse..

rawr. any advice?

I occasionally bite myself or hit myself when i can't contain my anger, i cut also
i broke the skin with the biting a couple of times and have caused bruises when i hit myself
i also do the hair-pulling thing every once in awhile
i havent been found out yet
sorry, no advice except maybe talk with her about how shes making you feel(lame, i know) sorry

Im a cutter have been for like a year an a bit, i cut at anything that upset me.
An recently iv been hurt really bad by the guy i loed an was with for 5 months
( see my poemsabout cutting an wanting to die )

An he said some hurtful things]
I dont doubt that cutting is addictivre cause it is.
But for once in my life i said no i dont want any more scares over him

so for now im not cutting an its hard ut you can stop u jus have to make yourself.

I promised my friend yesterday that i wouldnt cut for three days(i refused to promise to completely stop so we made a compromise) and today i resisted it for awhile but the temptation overtook me
she is very worried about me and says if i cut she will and i cant really tell if she is telling the truth or not since she lives in a diff. state!!! MANIPULATION!!! I love that she cares so much and i would do the same for her but im being pulled in a million diff. directions!!! i still dont know if i should tell her that i cut today i want to be honest with her but i dont want the consequences!!!!AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGHH!!!!!!!!!! >= z

Yeah, when its just you your hurting its not bad(well, not as bad) but when other people start hurting you get confused i hate myself already and when she tells me im making her worry all the time i hate myself more which makes me want to cut more etc... see my dilemma??? i repeat, AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow thats deep, i suddenly feel immature and small

Every time I think I'm done with the horrible, self-harming thoughts...they start racing through my mind again.

I think of death and self-mutilation so often but I refuse to start cutting myself again. It's so hard sometimes to resist though...I think all the time about finding cyanide though.

Yeah, I feel you. I mean, everytime I feel pain, I always think the only way I can feel better is through cutting. Then I cut. It's the only way, I can feel good and my day seems to be back to normal. Yet, NOBODY, [i mean] NOBODY, seems to understand. I know its bad, but at the same time, it actually heals a part of the sadness. I want to stop, at the same time, "no, not really, I'm good this way"

Everyone says "you should stop, you should stop" and i know i should, the only problem is, i really dont want to then again, ive only been doing it every couple of days for the past couple of weeks

I used to cut myself and I did it for a stupid reason. I stopped in 9th grade. Then I felt like my life wasn't any better, so I started again. I have always gone back to cutting whenever something went wrong. I still do it, but not all the time.
I feel like it should be a wake up call when you cut too deep and pass out. I have never cut too deep in my skin. But I feel if you should have to cut so deep, you might as well just kill your self. Cutting and making it bleed, making it leave scars doesn't do anything but control your pain. I hope everyone gets better with their cutting. :]

JUst because it has become a way of life for some of us, does not mean it is anymore acceptable. I would pray my friends would never have to find me that way. I don't have to cut deep to get relief, I guess I can be somewhat thankful for that.

The problem with stopping is if you dont start working on your problems and you do not come up with safer coping habits, you will definetely go back to what you know. It is just like being a drug addict.

I've been cutting for a year now and just so I don't drive myself crazy I have to cut every week at least twice. Help...I don't know how to stop....

Umm... first thing i can say is... at least you want to stop... thats a really good thing.

i think instead of doing it twice a week, go down to once a week... then, once ur ok with tht, try to skip every other week...
just try not to do it constantly, because thts when you become dependent on it...

~Sandra

Idk anymore, my parents have kicked me out, im back to smoking which is an addiction in itself. ive always been against cutting and always helping out my freinds that do , ive been thinking about alot more lately then anything even the cigaretes arent working. im constantly pissed off and when im not, wich is a miracle, i become uber depressed and tired.

what should i do?

I've cut alot...I have almost 35 scars on each of my arms and Ive been in and out of the hospital too..I smoke too...I just wish I could die..

When i was 11 i started cutting for all the wrong reasons, the best way to stop is talking, if you go to a counselor outside of school once or twice a week and just vent, it helps tremendously, its the only thing that got me to stop, I constantly found myself looking at my parents feeling so ashamed trying to hide my scars, and once they found out, all they did was say how bad it was gonna look while i carried all these scars around the rest of my life. So i went to counselling for about half a year and I am now cleansed of the horrible need to cut myself. The best way to stop is really just to talk to someone about it. if anyone needs to talk I'm also here~

Ive talked and talked and talked the problem is that im always angry and cant cry i hate myself and since i cant cry i let my arm cry for me

I used to be that way myself, i have a hard time crying still, but theres no use getting angry over not being able to cry, yes its refreshing sometimes, but look at it this way, you dont wanna be sad all the time, so you shouldnt want to cry all the time, and i understand that sometimes you are gonna feel like your never gonna be happy again, but theres always an open door.

I had a friend who was a cutter once. One day she got really depressed at school and came to me for help, well I was only 13 at the time so did not know what to do, so went to a teacher, in the process my friend went to the toilets and with a blunt knife slit her wrists open, she was found dead in the toilets 10mins later by me and another friend when we went looking for her!

For a few weeks after I found my friend, I started cutting. Mainly because I was in shock and also to cause pain so not to think about her. But after a while, when the shock started wearing off, I realised that what I was doing was dangerous and stopped. It has been four years now since I stopped cutting and my scars are fading!

Omg wow! thats harsh..Okay I know that she is scared of her parents who isn't? I dunno if talking is best for everyone. I'm glad it helped you out and everything but I know I can't talk to it with a psychologist/counselor/therapist/psychiatrist/etc... I've never been able to talk so...Yeah hmm but if it works go for it!
Cutting isn't something that you can start and just put down anytime you want. If you really are a true cutter(not saying is not, i'm using as reference to people that can't stop and are not just doing it for a fad) you can't stop, it will be your cross to bare. You just have to work with it, its not easy becoming able to say "I've quit"! It is a hard road, thats why unless you are truely addicted I beg you don't start so you won't subcome to it. I for one can't say I'm cut free...Even though I've been trying to quit for the last 2 years. Though I have a hard time trying not to. Yes at first when you try to go for a while without it you will get depressed...Its your mind urging you to. Its an addiction, you have to fight with all you have to stop! So yeah....>> I guess I will stop there for now.

I used to cut, and i think i might start again....

...do we all long for some release?