18 yr old threaten if not kissed! HELP!!

  • Krazikoko
    17 years ago

    Okay so my mom has completely LOST IT!! She told me that she was going to marry me with some foreign dude if I didnt at least get a first kiss already!! CAN YOu BELIEVE HER!!?
    Okay i know I'm 18 and all but, you cant force this things right?
    I know I never actually fallen for anyone and I had ran out when I do like someone but thats just the way I am. SHe ccant marry me!!
    I know Im scared of love and thats why I run out but she cant force me to marry some guy. She knew that so she threatened to leave me on the streets!! She's serious this time! I can tell!!
    All I need to do to get her off my back and my entire family too ( Yes they are all in this with my mom) is get a boyfriend or a kiss or even a friend with benefits(Yes they said thats valid) but I cant do it! Its too much pressure!! What Should i do?!!

  • X Kashies Misery X
    17 years ago

    Oh god thats a toughhh one!!!!.....ummm well, i guess....u could run away??? or just go up to some random guy and be like HEY, my mums gona marry me off if i dont kiss a guy so I CHOOSE U PUCKER UP! mwah! LOL ok, well that is a suggestion?? lol......tell ur mum NO! explain to her about why u dont want to and that she cant because u are old enough to do what u want, have u done this??? i suggest u find a guy friend and beg him into helping u lol

  • sibyllene
    17 years ago

    That's... twisted. You're 18 years old, not to mention American, if your profile is true. She can't technically marry you off to some guy. I wish you courage to stay strong, and not just settle for someone. It might be uncommon for you to be 18 and have never kissed, but it's not "weird."

  • HisBlueEyedAngel
    17 years ago

    I am soooooo sorry....What I would do is get a fake boyfriend tell him you need help even if you have to fake it with your family at least you wouldn't be stuck on the streets.

  • Brittney
    17 years ago

    Your mom can't do that to you. Though if your worried about making her happy then go find you some guy and kiss them and get it over with. Your mom can't make you marry anyone though. She doesn't have that right.

  • Jamie Lorraine
    17 years ago

    You are 18, in the eyes of the law you are a adult and therefore there is nothing that she can make you do against your will.

  • ABrookeD
    17 years ago

    Well, you're 18, she can't force you into something you don't want to do. Don't let her scare you. Come right out and say how you feel. If she still doesn't get it, let her know that you're 18 and make your own decision when it comes to this sort of thing. I thinks it's awesome that you havn't done anything like that. You're waiting and that's always good. Your mom has no right to tell you how to live your life. it's wrong that she's trying to force this upon you.

  • Rachel
    17 years ago

    You can,

    A) Tell her it's your life and you're not getting into anything until you feel its right. And that it's none of her buisness.

    B) Ask a friend to pretend to be your boyfriend. So you can say, "I have a boyfriend'' and he can come around to make it more real.

    C) Move out. Get away from that pressure!

  • Prophecies In Kodak
    17 years ago

    I'd go with the fake boyfriend gesture.

  • Teria
    17 years ago

    Pch. I agree, fake boyfriend.
    But, at the same time. . .
    What if she wants to meet him?

    Lmfao.
    Sorry, I tend to think of that kind of stuff.

    And, if she doesn't want to meet him, she might ask a lot of questions . . . such as; what's he look like? how old is he? where's he live? is he in school? blahblahblah.
    Too many lies. :|

    Maybe that's not a good idea.
    Just. . . move out?

  • TrueLover
    17 years ago

    Buy a blow up doll. See how that works when you bring him home to mama.

  • Prophecies In Kodak
    17 years ago

    Bring home a lady friend. that'll button her up. ;]

  • OMGdanielle
    17 years ago

    ^ ahahaha.

  • marilyn marti
    17 years ago

    WOW!! CRAZY FAMILY!!! HAHAHA..ur mom should be understanding of what you want and who you are..she doesnt have control of what u do with ur life...ignore it!!...but if u REALLY are scared then yea...find some guy! maybe even a guy u know fairly well...do ANYTHING to get them off ur back..but....if u honestly dont feel comfortable doing that...then i suggest u dont...u should never feel pressured to do somethin and u shouldnt force yourself either...choose between whose respect you want...ur moms...or your OWN! YOU DECIDE! GOOD LUCK

    luv, Marilyn.

  • OMGdanielle
    17 years ago

    If you have a fake boyfriend, your mom might expect you to kiss him in front of her...

  • Lucifer
    17 years ago

    Ok thats a tough one.....Well she cant force that stuff on ya as its against the law (where im from anyway).
    If you think it will help you could have a quite talk with her or if all else fails and you have a close guy friend (or girl friend) you could ask them to help you with this situation by playing along as your boy/girl friend.
    Hope i helped.

    XxLuciferxX

  • Choose xX Alex Xx Life
    17 years ago

    I really dont understand why you should be married off, its totally absurd, especially when its not religious. It should be up to you when your ready forcing you to do this will only make things worse. You will be unhappy and miserable. Try talking to her and tell her you want to decide your life from now on its time you stood on your own two feet. xxx alex xxx

  • Krazikoko
    17 years ago

    Okay... umm
    I already tried the fake boyfriend thing months ago with one of my friends and my mom is no dummy.
    It was just too awkward and we were friends so it didnt work coz my mom could see that it was fake(Im not a reeally good actor).

    And the other time I tried it with my other guy friend, HE FELL IN LOVE WITH ME!!
    So it was way more awkward coz he was my friend (my very good friend) and he felt so ashame coz he promised me he didnt want a relationship back then so he stopped talking to me. i miss him but hes trying to get over me so i think I need to give him space.
    Ive tried dating too but one guy tried to kISS ME BY FORCE and the other one (on the first date) WANTED TO HAVE SEX WITH ME!!
    So sorry If Im the cleanest person ever by being 18 end kissless(Yes i can assure you Im 18and never been kissed) but common here give me a break.

    And i cant try kissing a complete stranger coz which girl do you know has kissed a complete stranger for her first kiss.

    I dont think I can move out coz right now I have like 200 dollars ( I go to college(which they pay) and I love my family but shes just pissed off coz my little sisters hav all kissed already and had boyfriends)( My whole family is pissed off and scared I may stay alone forever and they are scaring me too).
    Ps: My mom mentioned India ( IM SCARED!!)And maybe Dominican REPUBLIC (HeLP!!)

  • Prophecies In Kodak
    17 years ago

    With all that said above.. Tut tut, I told you.. LADY FRIEND.

    But no.. Actually, you're 18 years old. You can legally make your own decisions. Your mother can't do that to you when you are legally an adult. She only can consent to marriage for you under the age of 18, before you are an adult.

    Mummy's going to shit a brick if she realizes you can refuse.

  • sexymama
    17 years ago

    JUST TELL HER HOW U FEEL AND IF THAT DOES'NT WORK FOLLOW YOUR HEART.

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  • OMGdanielle
    17 years ago

    I have to agree with kodak..

  • lover girl
    17 years ago

    Fake boyfriend those are hard to get beleave me ive tried

  • TrueLovesVictim
    17 years ago

    Hmm. go to a few friendly parties. or mabye talk about a guy but never bring him around. just talk about one till you find a real one.

  • Kayla
    17 years ago

    Wow... that is seriously twisted. I don't care what your mom says, she cannot force you into marrying someone!! You're 18!! You're technically an adult and she doesn't have any rights like that over you anymore.

    If I were you, I'd move out. Try to get a job and make a lot of extra cash.. move in with a friend, just get away from your family!! They shouldn't even think about doing that to you, it's not right. Your love life is none of their business. So what if you haven't ever kissed a guy or don't have a boyfriend when your 18? It's uncommon but like someone else has already said before, it's not "weird". Love takes time and it will come to you one day.

    If you can't move out right now.. then I say go with what the others said and get a fake boyfriend. Just have a close guy friend pretend to be your boyfriend to make your family happy until you're able to get enough cash to move out on your own and not have to worry about them anymore. Good luck!!

    ~Rikku~

  • xRenaissancex
    17 years ago

    Wow, in my opninion i think your lucky. having parents that actually want you to kiss someone or have a boyfriend isnt common. completely opposite of mine but thats my parents not yours i guess. anyways......i dont think you should be worried about getting a boyfriend you dont have to love him to marry him.............haha and i like the fake boyfriend idea xD

  • Kelly Xx
    17 years ago

    Just kiss a stranger , ur 18 u can to it !

  • mistressxsork
    17 years ago

    To the poster above, I believe she said she did not want her first kiss to be with a stranger.

  • Brian Hwang
    17 years ago

    Oh my gosh, this sounds so like something an asian parent would do, but even more extreme. And to all those that say, just tell your mom how you feel and talk it out, maaaan, extremist parents like this will totally disown you or beat your a** if they feel it's warranted. That Russell Peters stand-up comedy is all jokes, but it's based on a certain grain of truth, so I totally feel for you. Somebody gonna get a hurt, reeeal bad.

    My mother was forced into an arranged marriage when she was young with a man she detested. She ended up running away from Korea to Canada from him. Even had an abortion because the idea of having his baby disgusted her. She had to run to a different bloody country cause staying in Korea woulda been suicide.

    Anyway, ya, it's tough to balance your family's wishes. You obviously come from a very different cultural background. I say find true love, and do it quick. If not, do what I did when I knew my parents would be upset with some news about me. Stand-up to them, then run like hell and lock yourself in the bathroom for a day or two.

  • Brian Hwang
    17 years ago

    Oh, and I had a middle eastern friend once in somewhat of a similar situation. He was in love with a white girl and he knew that his parents would kill him if they found out. He had a fake middle eastern girlfriend, and yep, even had to kiss her in front of the parents. Hate to think about what would have happened if he wanted to marry the white girl. Unluckily, but luckily, they broke up and he ended up finding himself a real middle eastern girlfriend.

  • Krazikoko
    17 years ago

    Okay this is NOT normal where i come from. This is NOt a traditional thing. NOONE in my family has ever been on an arranged marriage. It's just that my mom thinks thats what I unsubscontially want because I read a LOT of stories about arranged marriages, I Write stories about it too AnD, I wrote the school play about an arranged marriage.
    I know it seems like I've fond the idea of one but I DONT! I told my mom that a gazillion times<<invented number<<<
    I just like it because its so uncommon and unwillingly. It's just entertaining because it's so weird.
    And now my mom thinks that i want to. Heck, my whole family thinks so coz they all saw my school play.
    My family just doesn't want me to miss out on love because I seem to be noncaring about it.
    And since appareantly, Im not being very clear about my feelings, then they just analyze my hobbies and take action from them. So they think I may want that when I clearly stated i didnt. AND I DONT.

  • xxSuicidalxx
    17 years ago

    Odd situation.....Tell her your waiting for the right guy to come along and you don't want an arraged marraige and remind her that you are 18 :)

  • Monica AKA Mika
    17 years ago

    Get a gay guy friend who will pose as your boyfriend and then just act like it was a tragic break up and you cant date for awhile

  • BrokenREALiTy
    17 years ago

    Arranged marriage ... Is that even legal?

  • OMGdanielle
    17 years ago

    Tell them that if they try to force you into these things, you will run like hell and never see them again. and when you do find love, that you will not invite them to your wedding.
    harsh, but sometimes it's needed.
    [ps doesnt mean you have to follow through!]
    and if they dont believe you, go somewhere for a few days to make it seem realer. that oughta knock some sense into them, if they dont want to lose you.

  • Kayla
    17 years ago

    ^ You could probably use that too.. hehe, it might give your family a reality check.

    But really... if they all think that you're wanting to have an arranged marriage, tell them that you DON'T and that's final! Print it off in big letters if you have to saying that you do not want to go through it. You just used an arrange marriage for your play to make it unusual and interesting, you're not serious about it for yourself. Tell them that you're just waiting for the right guy to come along and you don't want a relationship with just anybody!!

  • brokenmirror
    17 years ago

    Just turn around and say f*** off, its my life and i choose to live it the way i want to

  • OMGdanielle
    17 years ago

    You said you dont want your first kiss to be with a stranger..
    so kiss your best guy friend, right in front of her.
    say, there, i kissed a boy. we might not be dating, but i kissed him. now leave me the ^&*# alone!
    :D

  • Krazikoko
    17 years ago

    Okay
    I told my mom to stay away from my romantic life coz it only concerns ME! but she just BURST OUT LAUGHING!! And told me : What romantic life?? I would respect and stay away from your romantic life if you actually had one!! And she continued laughing...and laughing...AND LAUGHING!! My sisters started laughing too coz she started screaming it all over the house.

    Yeah... mom talk... not so good.

    And my Gay friends are too gay to act straight.
    I dont hav a best guy friend anymore, my best guy friend fell in love with me and felt bad about it so he stopped talking to me.( read my second post above for more info about it^)

  • TeenXLoveXTragedy
    17 years ago

    Stand up for yourself...she cant just marry you off to someone

  • Christianna
    17 years ago

    Stand up for yourself!
    call the cops perhaps?
    or bring yourself to fall in love with someone.