Is it carzy if.....?

Is it carzy that if i pray i ask to end my life?... i mean for the past few yrs, i guess 2yrs already i been asking God to take my life but ofcourse i wanna settle in heaven.
im so depress and really sad,i had this emotional delimma for the past year.
actually i got a lot of friends, we always party out , get wasted, im working in one of the big company , got enough money to but what i want but not happiness.
i felt so empty that i really wanna end this suffering..i even hated the world. i act so bitter in everything.
I dunno what the h3cK is missing. some of my friends are telling me that i might just need a boyfriend , but duh, i been into many relationship and it never works. it just gives me more problem and normally cause of my depression..
.... t i dont wanna commit suicide, or get myself killed in a wrong way...

Okay I'm not religious so I can't really answer your first question.
BUT, what I will say is that it sounds like you need to talk to someone, maybe a counslor or something. There's people out there TRAINED to deal with this kind of thing.

You even admit yourself you don't know what is missing, and that you have a lot of friends...yet you say you ask for your life to be taken..how would your friends feel if it was??? Do you want them to feel that way??

Start looking at the brighter things in life.
You have so many wonderful things, you even name them, and if you start looking at those positive influences instead of all this negative stuff, your life has the oppurtuinty to get even better.

This may even be a phaze you're going through...I think nearly everyone can say they've wanted to die at some point in their life..

Think about it.

I think this may be something you have to discuss with God....but I agree with the poster above, think about how your friends would feel after you leave? The emtyness they would have to carry for the rest of their lives...the pain does eventually subside to the point wear it becomes bearable, but the scar that remains is one that won't ever go away, trust me, one of my friends commited suicide a little over a year ago and ever since then our youth group has never been the same..it tore his girlfriend apart...and many of his friends, not to mention his pore mother who is still having to face every day without her son.
I'm not trying to make you feel bad in any way possible because I know what its like, I'm just saying that suicide is deffinitely not the ansher.
Talk to a professtional, ask God to give you the will to live, and focus on the positive, try to figure out why you want to die, really look into it and find the real reason behind your pain.
I'll be praying for you and if you ever need to talk please don't hesitate to pm. :)

I think this may be something you have to discuss with God....but I agree with the poster above, think about how your friends would feel after you leave? The emtyness they would have to carry for the rest of their lives...the pain does eventually subside to the point wear it becomes bearable, but the scar that remains is one that won't ever go away, trust me, one of my friends commited suicide a little over a year ago and ever since then our youth group has never been the same..it tore his girlfriend apart...and many of his friends, not to mention his pore mother who is still having to face every day without her son.
I'm not trying to make you feel bad in any way possible because I know what its like, I'm just saying that suicide is deffinitely not the ansher.
Talk to a professtional, ask God to give you the will to live, and focus on the positive, try to figure out why you want to die, really look into it and find the real reason behind your pain.
I'll be praying for you and if you ever need to talk please don't hesitate to pm. :)

I think this may be something you have to discuss with God....but I agree with the poster above, think about how your friends would feel after you leave? The emtyness they would have to carry for the rest of their lives...the pain does eventually subside to the point wear it becomes bearable, but the scar that remains is one that won't ever go away, trust me, one of my friends commited suicide a little over a year ago and ever since then our youth group has never been the same..it tore his girlfriend apart...and many of his friends, not to mention his pore mother who is still having to face every day without her son.
I'm not trying to make you feel bad in any way possible because I know what its like, I'm just saying that suicide is deffinitely not the ansher.
Talk to a professtional, ask God to give you the will to live, and focus on the positive, try to figure out why you want to die, really look into it and find the real reason behind your pain.
I'll be praying for you and if you ever need to talk please don't hesitate to pm. :)

I think this may be something you have to discuss with God....but I agree with the poster above, think about how your friends would feel after you leave? The emtyness they would have to carry for the rest of their lives...the pain does eventually subside to the point wear it becomes bearable, but the scar that remains is one that won't ever go away, trust me, one of my friends commited suicide a little over a year ago and ever since then our youth group has never been the same..it tore his girlfriend apart...and many of his friends, not to mention his pore mother who is still having to face every day without her son.
I'm not trying to make you feel bad in any way possible because I know what its like, I'm just saying that suicide is deffinitely not the ansher.
Talk to a professtional, ask God to give you the will to live, and focus on the positive, try to figure out why you want to die, really look into it and find the real reason behind your pain.
I'll be praying for you and if you ever need to talk please don't hesitate to pm. :)

Actually after partying out and get wasted, when im alone, i felt empty again. i been too independent and i am sort of tired of being a strong woman, i mean most of friends normally run for me if they got any problem, but if im on trouble im alone, i have no one to turn too. they are too weak that they cant give me advice, they are weak to tell me that i am wrong...
i jst felt that i need someone who is i guess stronger and more independent than me..

WTH. Ok, you need help, i suggest you go and go talk to someone, God? what if he isnt real? what if ur waisting ur time just hopeing and wishing 'something' will grant ur wish, sorry to burst ur bubble hun, but wishes never really come true. Ive been really depressed lately, always have, it gets easier when u pull it all together try and figure out wut everything means, and if u go and talk to a phycologist or sumthin im doin that, it atcually really works. Boys are mostly jerks, you DO NOT NEED a bf to get you through, chances are it wont last if you are down on urself and there for wont put much into the relationship. Get over it, get out there, think think THINK, find yourself again, you were not always this way, its up to you to make a change NO ONE ELSE can do this for you, and I no u will be fine if you figure out what ur purpose is, for there is so much in the world man! dont kill urself, if ur depresed why dont u study and live life to help people who have been in that persition something uve never had?????

Dont look for the easy way out

Look for the best way to make urself better

Don't ask someone else to do what you want for you (even if their existence is questionable). Honestly, how would you feel if you lost a friend? Think about it -- that's exactly how you're friends are gonna feel if they ever lost you for good. Life's only this horrible if you let it be. You're trying too hard -- looking for THE easiest escape. Life's there to embrace, not to trip over and fall into a ditch, trying to claw your way out until you finally just wanna die.

You say that you want to be in heaven, but you are participating in activities that are not of God.

Yes, I believe in God and I am a christian. I do not mean to preach, and honestly I would not have even mentioned God, but you did so I am going to go there.

What are you missing? I'm going to take a blind guess here and say God.

Do you read your bible? Do you attend church? Do you surround yourself with others that have the same religous beliefs as you? Do you participate in Godly activities?

Though getting high and partying all night may seem like fun it does grow old after a while and all the problems that were there originally remain; however now they have grown into bigger problems complied with even more problems.

Money does not buy happiness; however using your money in a responsible manner and also helping others will increase your happiness.

Wanting to die is a normal feeling from time to time. If a person feels so over whelmed with grief then yes, it is a normal feeling.

Actually, all feelings are normal. The question is how do you react to such feelings? We tend to question everything, but in the end it is how we react and behave that ultimately influence how we feel emotionally.

Simply put, if we behave in a negative manner then our long term feelings will be negative.

Have you ever heard of fake it til you make it?

Try it.. fake being truly happy and helping others for a good month and then all of a sudden you will realize that you are no longer faking your happiness, but you have made your own happiness.

Instead of praying that God take your life, try praying that God give you the desrie to live your life according to HIS will.

Also, praise God.. praise hm for the things that you do have and give praise in advance for the blessings that he will bring forth.

Again, fake it til you make it!

Just my rambles.....

~~Sher

I surely appreciate sher comment and ofcourse the rest of you people..
to sher, i am religous, i am a christian too, not a devoted one,but i believe in GOD. i make sure that i visit church atleast once a week. i been talking to god, i even cry while i confess to him, i really having hard time with what the burden and emptiness that i been going through.
i really hate the past, those people whom i trusted before. it seems that my friends, to whom i used to go out back in college, those people i spent most of time, people that fight againts all odds.
i dunno if this is still normal. i mean i been in this grief for 2 yrs or more. and everytime i seek for happiness it seems that a lot is still missing.