Heart troubles

I have problems with someone I love
I know I probably sound stupid but no one I know has any good advice.....

I have been dating a girl who lives near me and goes to my high school...
and I want to ask her to be my girlfriend but there is a problem...I have friends that are threatening to kill themselves if i do because they love me...

Now I don't know what to do......any advice?

What exactly do you mean when you say:

"have friends that are threatening to kill themselves if i do because they love me"?

Are your friends threatening to kill themselves because they think this girl you like is trouble, or because they like you?

You're going to have to be more literal, dear.

Talk to your friends about it!! Tell them that if they really care about you, they won't do anything rash.. they'll be happy for you no matter what and will support you 100%!

You need to talk to her about your situation too. Tell her that you really like her and that you really want to be with her, but you have problems with your friends.. get her opinion on it and see if she wants to be with you too. Maybe you guys can work something out? Anyways, good luck!!

~Rikku~

They said that she is trouble but I don't think so....i've been dating her for a few weeks and she isn't anything like what they are telling me....plus my friends do like me

Thanks for the advice

They say that she's in trouble? I wouldn't listen.. if they like you like you say they do, then they're probably just trying to cause trouble for you both.

Ask her about it! Tell her what you've heard and ask her what's going on. You should depend on what she says more than what they're saying.

And no problem sweetie, I'm glad I could help out somehow.

In that case, I would ask my friends to prove that it. I wouldn't start dating her unless I was certain, but of course, you are a different person and entitled to your thoughts about whether or not to approach someone having being told they're 'trouble'.

Threatening to kill themselves??? Uhm, your friends are the ones who need help. Go with your gut feeling on this girl. If you like her then go for it.

First of all, I think you need to stop worrying about your friends, and what they will do if you go out with this girl. Ask yourself what's more important to you...your happiness, or that of your friends. Is it possible for you to sacrifice love for others?

If your friends matter more to you than love...go with your friends. Are you sure they will be so upset? It will be a difficult decision, and if you're a person more prone to self-harm or suicide yourself, I would advise against it...suicide is the ultimate selfish act.

Secondly, I would avoid direct confrontation, if she is "trouble". Perhaps she is different around you? Instead drop more subtle hints toward her, see if that works better, and whatever you do, don't do that around her friends or yours, keep them uninvolved, possibly with the exception on one or two.

Which leads me to my next point...tell someone. Tell someone you trust most, I would advise against a parent, often a close friend is better to tell about matters of love. And tell them everything...as the old adage goes, "A problem shared is a problem halved". However, make sure there is mutual trust between who you tell, you wouldn't want things to be spread around.

To summarize, drop the waterline to a friend you trust, and make a decision over whether love is important to you, or the possibility of some unhappiness on your friends part. Often love may alienate us from our friends, don't allow that to happen to you.

Good luck.

Tell them they are being selfish, and to be happy for you.

Yay i is troubles

Or am i?

Lol...you just had to post on this problem didn't you...o well..makes it easier to ask you anyways

Oh really? =P

Yup

Lol meany

Why are we talking on the post?

Cause im specials! i can do what i wanna do

Wow carter put some thought into this one

Yeah i know...but i heard it before so thats why i asked for new advice

Ah ics

Now you know why I can't ask you...sorry I didn't tell you earlier

Np, i understands

Ok

What if I were to ask you on a public forum?

Lol what if?

Can I at least ask your opinion on this?

As in...

What should I do about you?

I unno. it is your life, aswell as your desicion.

But the answer is just as important

You know im not good with advice, and i dont want to mess anything up.

How could you mess anything up?...im the one going to ask

Lol i usually do no matter what

Ok I will ask

And i still dont know who is threatening to kill themselves

I told you I made a promise and I can't tell anyone...sorry

U will, will you? and its fine im just curious

Yup...I just don't know what words to say though

Lol ic