Honest criticism??

I cannot believe that you are calling his poem "unreal". A poem can be anything. A poem does NOT need to be consistent, nor does it need to make any sense.
Another thing, when you talk about how it is sometimes structurally incorrect, it's ok for it. It's poetry, not prose. The whole magic of poetry is that you can do what you want and not have to conform to the rules of grammar, spelling and vocabulary.
Also, when you said that the fact that he loves her more than heaven, who are you to say that since YOU don't love heaven, that he can't either? Sometimes in poetry you don't always mean everything in such "blatantness". Maybe it was a metaphor, but you can't know since you didn't write the poem. A lot of my poems have, as you would say "forced rhymes", but then again, maybe that's the way I like my poetry.
It's nice of you to take two hours of your time to critique his poetry. Does it really matter how long?

xoxZoexox

all poems make sense. you just have to try and find the message. some are easier than others.

Well, I won't lie, when I got my first, "honest criticism comment" I was pretty shocked. I had never had someone say one of my poems weren't very good. Ever. And it hurt my pride. But then as I read the comment over again I realized that it actually had encouragement included as well. So I took their advice and went back and re-read my poem, changing what needed to be changed, and so on. Since then, I've learned to appreciate people's comments on my poems.. whether they be nice or mean.

I think honest criticism is okay.. if you are encouraging the writer. A lot of new people who have joined the site are most likely not expecting people to say, "Okay.. your poem sucks. Do this and this to make it not suck." This site it to share your poetry with other poets.. hoping that other people will treat you the way you'd like to be treated. And part of that is honest criticism. Yet, I've read many comments where people just bash each other.. WITHOUT any encouragement what-so-ever. It's almost as if people use the, "Honest criticism" phrase to put down people, so they can make themselves look better.

There are many people on this site who's opinions I highly respect.. and there are people on this site who's opinions I could really careless about. I most definitely think that if you're going to leave a comment, and go into detail about how, "terrible" the poem was, then you need to have encouragement following it. We're supposed to build each other up, not tear each other down.

~Edited out!~

I should add that your actual critique itself of Rohit's poem does contain some very worthwhile advice, at least in my own humble opinion. But if the price of constructive criticism is to be demeaned and insulted, it is not worth it.

I agree with the gist of what Lydia was saying. Some of your criticism was warranted, and I applaud you for that. However, calling the poet girly was unnecessary. There were some parts of your comment that didn't seem to be in the spirit of helping at all. However, I do agree with Killer; some people can take it, and some can't. Feel free to tear mine to shreds too, I think there are too many people who don't take the time to criticize.

note to people who say that poems can be like anything:
There is a certain level of truth to what you say, but there is another level in which you couldn't be more wrong. Poetry is an art form, much like painting, acting, dancing, singing, music, etc. In any and all of these spheres of art, you will find that there are things to learn and rules to understand. Understanding these rules is the first step you should make before breaking them. Every great artist was proficient at the art form they broke free from, they just realized in their genius that breaking the rules would create a different, though equally true, style. You can't just skip over all the rules of perspective, draw a picasso-esque drawing in the 2nd grade, and call it just as much a masterpiece as an actual Picasso painting. Similarly, you cannot self-rightously ignore the rules of grammar and general rhythm, and leap forth into a confused world of chaotic syllables counts, sentences written in all caps, and small shapes (e.g. hearts) inserted in your poem after every instance of the word "love."

Okay... I didn't read any of the above posts, so sorry if I repeat anything... I saw the link, and went to it, and this is what I determined.
I believe in honest critisism, and I give it at every chance I have, and I gladly recieve it... However...

First off, declaring yourself having more writing experience than Rohit is an assumption. You don't truly know that, unless you truly know Rohit.
Secondly, I do not see the arrogance you refer to in your comment... There must obviously be a lot missing to this comments page or something... You keep talking to him as if you really know him, and you critisize what he's said in the past, yet, I don't read that anywhere in his poem, or on the comments page.....???
Thirdly, most of your lettered suggestions were good. However,
1) There's nothing wrong with cliche... if you know how to work with it.
2) There's nothing wrong with long poems, either... I, personally enjoy longer poems (I just can't write them =P)
3) Poetry is left up to the mind that writes it. There, really are no "Guidelines" for poetry. I mean, that's what makes poetry so cool.
Fourthly, "I’ve never seen heaven, so I find no reason why I should love the heaven or as a matter of fact anyone should." Since when did YOU become the person that established everything that goes through our minds?! Obviously, no one alive has seen heaven. It's called a figure of speech! (look! He followed one of your little helpful guides!). BTW, I haven't heard, "I love you more than heaven" much at all, in all of the poetry I've read. I've seen allusions to angels, and the glory of heaven, but... no...

Seriously, though, some of your points in this comment were valid. However, you can't sit there and pick it completely apart because it doesn't appeal directly to you. Face it, not every poem is going to appeal directly to its readers, and you are no exeption. In my critical opinion, I think you critisism was a little too nit-picky. Apparently, the girl he dedicated it to liked it, and I think that's all he was trying to get across...

~Ciao Lipton

Sean, your thoughts about rules and breaking them are very well stated.

When I see a poem peppered with errors in grammar, usage, spelling, etc. which have obviously resulted from carelessness or ignorance, it frequently creates enough of a distraction to keep me from wanting to finish reading the poem. That is altogether different from instances where a writer has purposefully diverted from the normal rules to accomplish some creative purpose.

I agree wholeheartedly with you Lipton! =D lol.

I agree w/ Lipton and Lydia

Rupan, you are arrogant in some of your comments, it is clear that you believe, despite not dsiplaying this in any strong way in your writing, that your knowledge of the written word is far superior to everyone else on this site.

Don't include me as a confederate in your rants please.

Lydia, you can use my name if you like, afterall i was the one who compared the feeling Rohits poem gave me to urinating on myself as a child ....not the best metaphor i've ever conjured from the ether...but...well...have any of you pee'd your pants recently? It actually feels quite nice at first...then the smell kicks in and realise you've been here before and it ain't good.

Yeah, most folk here can't handle anything being said about their poems thats isn't the generic

"Nice poem, well done"

I don't know why they bother reading their comments.

Putting yourself above another write was your first mistake. No one is better than someone else. You can't critique someone for not seeing eye to eye with you can ya? No, you can't. Like mentioned before poetry is an expressive thing meant to be interpreted however you want. Your second mistake was downing cliche. There is nothing wrong with using them when used in the correct context. Grammar is somewhat important but reading over it I didnt see anything wrong with the poem that pulled away from its meaning as a whole. Rhyming takes practice, not everyone is great at it but you could of taken a better approach to explaining what you meant. Long poems I find to be more interesting than short ones. It leaves you with a certian feeling if written well. When you write its not to humor someone else. Its to express yourself in a visual form. You should never compair yourself to another writer because everyone has thier own voice in writing. They also have their own use of allusions, assonance, constanance, and illiterations. Your poem should be unique unless you are purposly trying to shadow another writers work. Which I find to be better practice than reading someone elses work. This gives you a chance to experiement with different types of styles. And yes I agree you should learn positive critiqueing when given in a unbiased, dipolmatic manner. And to be perfectly honest, you weren't giving an honest opinion, you were saying how you would do it and your way isn't always what fits somone else's personality. And coming from someone who says their life is poetry and only has 4 poems on the site I find that quiet interesting.

~Edited out!~

Poetry for me means freedom - in EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. You don't like something? Move on. Honest critique is always good, I like recieving hints and tips. So long as it doesn't become abusive. People shouldn't be insulted if someone says they don't like their poem. But if the reader is going to take the time to say that, he/she should also take the time to give some reason why ...

x x x x

Lydia-
What do you mean????
xoxZoexox