How can I fix this?

I loved him. I do love him....but I hurt him.

Together for about 5 months all together but we have known eachother longer. He was my sun...my moon, my everything!
We go to different skool's so its definitally hard because alot of guys like me and im a big flirt and alot of girls like him and he flirts...but I crossed the line.
My ex walked back into the picture and I felt attracted to him again but I still love my boyfriend now.
My boyfriend has been grounded lately so I got bored and messaged me ex...I ended up telling my ex I missed him and how much I still cared for him....Then my boyfriend found out...my ex sent him all the texts I sent him and now my boyfriend is crushed..he says he can't break up with me becasue that could kill him..but he says he has this hate for me and things wont be the same again...
Im so scared..Im sick to my stomach (litterally)..Im not well..Im scared
I know Im wrong
Im trying to fix it, but what can I possibly do to show my boyfriend he is the one I want to be with??
How do I make it right again??

Please Help Me!

My friend sort of went through the same thing. [Only, her boyfriend never found out, even though her ex wanted to do the same thing your ex did. ((But I was there to stop him))] Your boyfriend now has lost trust in you, that's a given. You should ask him what he wants from you. If he says he wants you to stop talking to your ex, explain to him how you feel about that. If he just wants to know he can trust you, make him see that your trustworthy. Of course, this might take a little time, because things like this will never just blow over.
And explain to your boyfriend how much you love and don't wanna lose him. Explain to him that if you really didn't care, would you still be there with him? If he cares about you as much as you care about him, he'll understand. .even if it takes a little time. :]

I tried asking him what I could do to fix it...all he had to say was "I dont know..It was your mistake".
I beged for him to stay and not to ever say those words to me and all he could say was "You should have never cheated on me"...But see i didnt really cheat on him...i just said things to my ex and now..its all falling apart

First, he shouldn't be saying "it's your mistake" because you guys are suppose to go through everything together. And tell him you didn't cheat on him. I mean, doesn't he have an ex? that he cares about still? Ask him what he would've done. And tell him not to give you an b.s. about how he probably "wouldnt have talked to her at all."

We have been through so much..and he told me he would give me another chance because I gave him one when he messed up...the funny thing is though, he messed up worse than i did yet he makes me wish I were dead..He left me and went out with a few girls and then decided he wanted it to work..I let him in without the whole pain...i kept it to myself..and ever since we have been dating there was this one time like 2 weeks ago my best friend caught him with some other girl in the store holding her hand and stuff but he denied it and my mom told me to trust him.....I just dont know how all this could happen to me...

It seems like he's a player, a jerk who thinks he can do whatever he wants and get whatever girl he wants. I know a lot of guys like this, unfortunately though, these guys are my friend. [ironic, huh?] But anyway, if he's denying it, means he's lying to you. Do you really wanna be in a relationship where there's no trust? I mean, it seems like you like him. .ALOT. But it also seems like he's just a big fat jerkface. .Maybe. .He's not worth it, not worth your time. Maybe you're better than him and you definitely deserve better than him.

He was once the player type, but once he came back to me we were perfect, so unbreakable.....
I never trusted him..he trusted me...He said "This whole time you didnt trust me but you should have and I trusted you but I shouldnt have"
That crushed me but I knew he was right...
I may deserve better but with him when we are together nothing in the world could break us apart..Not one person could interfere...But when we are apart reality kicks in and we are no longer in a dream..
Better is something I dont think I could find for awhile though

I think a lot of relationships are like that, seemingly perfect from one point to another.
And even if things don't work out in the end, you shouldn't fret about it. He shouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing that he won. I mean, sure, you'll be sad for a little while, that's a given. But don't dwell on the past, because it's meant to be there.
And someone once told me [wow. that line sounds too cliche. .] that you'll find someone when you stop looking. You'll find "better" when you least expect it. :]

I hope your right....
I really needed this..Thank You so Much

*big hugs*

Youre welcome.
I hope things turn out for the better. :)

*hugs back*

Hay one more thing...May I add you so in the future I could tell you how things turn out and stuff?

Sure. :]

Kk
thanx again :)