I Need Help!

Is it possible to be more in love with your dead ex-boyfriend than your boyfriend you have now? I really do love my fiance, but sometimes I don't know how to feel. Can you help?

.: CiNdY:.

I guess i mean if you still love one that you've lost there is nothing wrong with that one of my friends well more of family since ive known her forever her husband died about two years ago and she still loves him she doesnt let it show alot but she does and if you love him you cant really help that love just is , was he your first love? if he was that could be another reason tell me the whole story on a privatre message and ill help you out as much as i can ok

Thats a tough one.
The thing is, although your in love with your fiance, the love never really died for your ex as you were still in love when you were torn apart.
To be honest a part of you will always love him as you weren't with him long enough to have any change of feelings.
The only thing i think you can do is just try to accept the fact that although you love your ex, you can't be with him again and you need to make it work with your fiance.
I'm not doubting that you love your fiance, from the way i've seen you talk about him in other threads, you seem very happy with him, so give yourself time to let these feelings fade, and in time they will.
You can't rush them and you can't force them to go away so just concentrate on the life you have and know that your ex is very happy for you cos i'm sure he is.
Good luck sweets
*Gem*

Your ex is dead, so it is not like you had a horrible break up and lost the love you held for him, of course you still have love for him. It's okay to love him, you never have to stop, but don't let it hinder your new relationship, I am sur ehe would want you to be happy.

^Actually we did have a horrible break up. We broke up the day before he died.

Yeah, someone suggested me to write letters to him and save them in a box or something. I really do love my fiance and we're happy. He makes me happy since he gave me my son and I really thank him for that.

It's perfectly normal what you're feeling so don't let anyone make you feel bad over this. It's going to take time for the feelings to fade but you seem to be doing well so don't dwell on it

^ Well thanks Gem, you really helped me. =D

I hope so because you seem like a very geniuine person who is just torn up inside which like i said is normal, the fact you had a horrible break up the day before will also play a part in the fact you may have some deeper feelings of guilt inside, maybe the fact you never made up? Or maybe because your sorry and never got the chance to tell him.
Just take comfort in the fact he knows your sorry and that you loved him and is most probably very happy you managed to find love and happiness so enjoy your life

^Aw, that is super cute, thanks Gem! =D

Yeah, it's probably that exact reason like you mentioned. I do pray at night for him sometimes, telling him I still love him and I miss him. It's kind of crazy though cause it's been almost 2-3 years ago, and I still haven't gotten over him. I do have a pretty happy life with my fiance though and he knows it, too. He does hear me pray for Anthony and he doesn't mind, so that's what makes me love him even more.

Thats beautiful that he understands you so well and respects that.
You've found a good man there =)
It doesn't matter how long it's been, a part of you will always feel this way, it may fade in time and grow smaller, but thats life =)

That's true, it is life. I know I've found a good man. I've known him for so long that we practically know everything about each other. I'm glad he's the one I chose to spend my life with.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I called my fiance by my ex's name about 2 days ago. Now, he's not talking to me. When he leaves, he just kisses me, says bye and leaves. When he gets home, he takes a shower and doesn't say a word to me in dinner. I feel really bad and I don't know what to do! I'm really sad because I really do love my man, but I can't seem to forget my ex! Ugh, I hate this!!

Well let me first off start this by saying your only 19. Theres no need to rush into this fiance/marriage deal, but thats just my opinion. Second off, if your not over your ex and you love him more than you love your current bf, then w.t.f. are you doing with a new guy? It means your not over him and you need to have some time to heal and get over the past. Theres a reason they tell you to give dating a break after a breakup, and this is a prime example. Calling your fiance your ex's name is some deep you know what, so Im not suprised by his reaction. Id sit down and really think this out and see how youve got your life set up. Personally I think you dug yourself a hole but Im no shrink. Pieces.

^It's not a typical "breakup" if the person is no longer alive. From what I've been able to tell, the OP has a rather stable relationship with her boyfriend, who is also the father of her baby.

...

^ Let me just remind you that my ex is no longer here. Furthermore, he hasn't been here for almost 3 years. It was a mistake of callin him by my ex's name. We talked about it already and he forgave me about it and now we're happy. There's nothing in the world that would make me break my fiance. We have a stable relationship, living together and with our son. It was all a mistake.

For the ones who helped me, thank you for your help.

Glad things are better
PM me if u ever need to vent again
LOL
xx

Well i honestly think it is possible im 17 and my bestfriend died the day before my birthday of this october:( we really loved each other i was just to scared to act on it, and now im with this other guy. but even tho im with this other guy i styll think of joe everyday<3 cause i miss him and love him, he helped me find a part of me, that i couldn't find before when i was running around drinking and doing shit that could of killed me but he showed me how to have a life with out risking looseing it, so yeah i would sya you can love your dead ex- boyfriend more then the one now, because maybe this guy cant fill the space of your ex, because he gave you something that this person cant